Lost and Torn
by ichkak
Summary: IchXBya eventually. Ichigo is returned home from Hueco Mundo. He's seperated from his Hollow and lives in torment about his time there. M Rating. Rape, torture, Lots of angst! One noble seems to be his route to recovery. Last Chapter SMEXY 11 up! COMPLETE
1. Found

He was running

My fav bleach characters again! I just love these two hotties and another story popped in my head having read so many on here about Ichigo being captured, not many went on about his recovery or time back home. So this little tale came to mind.

Please ignore spellings – I'm English – so don't expect American spelling. This is also my creative juices and therefore my right to adapt things to suit my story. The original Bleach is obviously not mine (DUH!), but that doesn't mean I cannot add my own tit-bits where I see fit!

**I thrive on reviews**, so feel free to tell me any **idea's** you have or things **you want to see happen** and I can see what I can do. I also want to know **how graphic** you want Ichigo's memories to be, as I don't really want to offend or upset anyone. I have rated this as an M for future chapters just in case!

He was running. That was unusual enough for anyone who saw him.

He was running so hard that the sweat was pouring off him as he thundered through the streets of Seireitei. His shunpo skills in full use and view of those with quick enough eyes to see it.

In his arms was wrapped something, no someone, in his captains cloak. His dark hair flew behind him, his expensive kenseikan scarf was beginning to change red as the liquid of life seeped from the unconscious figure in his arms. That same scarf had been tied as tight as he could make it in his shocked condition to stop the flow of blood in the hope that it would save a tragic death.

His footsteps flew noisily into the fourth division, shouting with desperation and swiping the figure from anyone else who dared to attempt to help him.

"Unohana!" He repeated frantically just running onwards towards the quiet captains office.

"Byakuya!" she was startled by his outburst and looked surprised at the flash of orange hair sprouting from his captains cloak. "Kurosaki?" She questioned. "How?"

"I don't know." He began to pant from his exertion and she took his arm and lead him to the closest emergency room.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

The group of Captains muttered amongst themselves it was usual and understandable for Unohana to be late to a captains meeting due to the nature of her role, but not Byakuya. If the man could, he would drag his dying body to these meetings.

The mutterings were only sharing rumors they had heard, but a sudden change in personality as they were hearing, did seem very unusual.

"Well it seems we must begin without all you present." Shigekuni Yamamoto announced with the crack of his elaborate stick onto the polished wooden floor. "We have seen an unprecedented rise in activity on all Hollow levels. The fact that we have been unable to locate Kurosaki Ichigo is unusual. His timing of disappearance seems to be coincide with the attack of two Arrancar's three weeks ago. Now is the time to consider all possibilities."

"It seems as if the boy has been found." Unohana Retsu's calm voice entered with her graceful flow across the room. "Kuchiki Taichō arrived at my office with an unconscious Kurosaki Ichigo just a few hours ago."

"We heard rumors he was running through Seireitei. But you know its Byakuya it seemed farfetched." Soifon spoke.

"What is the boy's condition Unohana Taicho?"

"It seems that he has suffered considerable torment. The exact extent seems to be unclear at this stage. I do not feel that it would be appropriate to detail them in full. I will prepare a report for you Sōtaichō. Kuchiki Taicho's actions probably saved his life." The commander trusted her judgment.

"And our 6th division captain, he is not still at your offices?"

"The appearance and nature of the injuries have left the captain … a little shocked. I advised him to rest." Another murmur ran through the captains. Byakuya shocked to the point it was a medical matter seemed again highly unusual.

"Shocked? Then maybe we need a little more information hey Retus?" Shunsui Kyōraku spoke with the concern that the others were feeling. "Where was Kurosaki found? What happened to him? I was not aware that Byakuya was away on a mission to retrieve the boy?"

"From what I can gather, the captain found him quite by chance within his own grounds. There was a heavy Arrancar retsui residue which Captain Kuchiki sensed. When he searched for its source, he found the boy, and using his own words, just standing there bleeding to death. He made no sound, no movement, no evidence he was aware of anything. Indeed when I looked at the gaping wound in his chest, it was impossible to believe that Kurosaki would be standing at all."

"So its safe to assume that he was taken to Hueco Mundo against his will?"

"I am sure that no human would intentionally let themselves suffer the list of injuries I have logged. I can see no gain from what has happened to him from either point of view. All that I can surmise is that he will not be ready for the war when it comes. Aizen could not turn him and so we are left with a once powerful man who will be unable to fight."

"We will have to rethink our plans for the war."

"Then we should not have planned to so much on the shoulders of one child. And after all that's all he is, a child." Ukitake said sadly. Others around him nodded.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya was glad of the chance to rest at his home. He sat on his futon and laid back lazily closing his eyes and wishing he could shut out what he had witnessed today. A hand covered his eyes and his stomach growled with the impending release of his breakfast.

"Nii-sama?" Rukia was passing her brothers sleeping quarters when she heard the unmistakable sound of retching. She walked with some trepidation into the room, her eye passed over the discarded kenseikan and cloak, gasping at the sight of blood on them. "Nii-sama!" she said alarmed and ran towards the sound of more retching from the bathroom.

"Rukia." Byakuya panted clearly uncomfortable that he had been found when this shaken.

"Shall I call someone for you?"

"No." He shook his head and made his way to the jug and bowl of water and freshened his face. "No … I just…" Since when was he ever lost for words. He let out a sigh and looked at her with an expression he had never seen on his face. Utter disgust and despair, all combined into one pained and sorrowful face. "I cannot believe the depths that Aizen would stoop to. We must win this war."

"What has happened?" He approached her and held her shoulders.

"Promise me you will never attempt to go to Hueco Mundo again."

"But…"

"Its important Rukia. Promise me, I don't care, even if it is me you wish to find, just promise me." Her eyes opened startled with his begging tone.

"I promise." He seemed to relax some what and released her. She watched him walk to his futon and sit on the side, running his hands through his hair and letting out another sigh of despair. He gestured for her to sit and she knelt before him, again startled as he took her hand and held it on his lap. "I found Kurosaki Ichigo this morning." Her eyes peeled even wider and he she pleaded silently for him to tell her everything. Was this the cause of his state? "He had been hurt badly Rukia…I have never seen anything so vile in all my life… It sickened me when I saw him…" His head dropped down he couldn't bare the look of worry in her eyes nor the memory of earlier.

"Is he dying?"

"Not now I think… Rukia…I don't know if he'll get over this." When her brother had made no sounds before that he so much as tolerated the substitute shingigami it seemed a little melodramatic to witness this display of trauma. "Physically yes maybe, emotionally… I think not… I would not wish anyone to suffer like that."

"Like what?"

"He was torn apart… literally… They must have abused him so many times…" His voice was quiet and horrified at the telling. His elbows moved to his knees and he buried his hands into his face. "Scars, bruises everywhere. I could not feel any spiritual energy in him at all…his eyes…were like blank lifeless orbs. He didn't seem to hear me, see me or feel me when I approached him…He was just a bleeding, mound of flesh. There was nothing there Rukia of the person we knew. Nothing. One flesh wound in his chest was fresher and worse than most. I think that was what made him collapse in the end; there was so much blood around his feet." He paused gathering his composure again. "I did what I could, trying to stop the blood flow and wrapped him in my cloak. When I picked him up, there was nothing of him."

"Nii-sama?" Rukia spoke softly worried for Ichigo and seeing her usual hard faced brother so shattered and open. She moved to sit on the bed beside him and felt a rush of wonderment and surprise as he leant into her and laid his head on her shoulder.

"If it's the last thing I do Rukia. I am going to be the man I wished I had been." Looking into her eyes he could tell she didn't understand him. "Instead of harsh, I should have been honest. Instead of pushing him away, I should have shown my interest. Instead of pretending arrogance I should have shown compassion. But I'll show my compassion now. I'll show him that I'll do everything to make this okay again…everything that is possible."

"Byakuya…" Rukia used his name in surprise; so unaware of his real feelings. "You care for Ichigo?"

"So much it hurts." He whispered. "I'm sorry."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --


	2. One by one

Part two already as I'm much further ahead on my laptop and can't help myself! Upload, i must upload!

Please do correct me on the spelling of Hichigo if its not right. My computer has a wobbly every time I write it!

**I thrive on reviews**, so feel free to tell me any **idea's** you have or things **you want to see happen** and I can see what I can do. I also want to know **how graphic** you want Ichigo's memories to be, as I don't really want to offend or upset anyone. I have rated this as an M for future chapters cos its needed!

* * *

Unohana was surprised to return to her hospital and find so many people wondering about the ginger boy. So many of them regarded him as the one who would save them this war. The one who had the power to protect them all and stop the devastation that would fall upon them when this war started.

She looked down at the sleeping human and shook her head. What could she do to help him? How many people were going to have their hopes dashed when the truth of his condition became common knowledge. The shell before her, was probably going to remain just that, a shell. No hero laid here anymore. No genius, all powerful saviour. Just a poor boy who had suffered something that no one should ever suffer.

Broken was an inept word to describe the feeling that radiated from him. Broken, damaged, tainted…empty. Faintly she felt another feeling…lost.

Her hand touched his face in a gentle way and she wished him a silent prayer of hope and recovery.

The squad had worked hard to heal the physical wounds. Traces of fresh scarring showed proud in pink tendrils threading over his body. It differentiated the old war wounds earned in an honourable fashion and the despicable new wounds, freshly gained during a fight for more than survival. Visible scars however always had the chance to be accepted and ignored. Mental scars formed deeper grooves of change that allowed fear, regret and self loathing to harbour. Who was going to save Kurosaki from himself? Who was going to bring this drugged teen back from the darkness he was lost in.

A distressed murmur escaped the lips and she soothed his brow with a caring stroke of her finger tips.

"Your safe here Kurosaki. Let yourself sleep." She whispered.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Inside his mind, there was only the world of black and white now. Colour seemed something fanciful and made up in his imagination. Black represented himself, white his tormentors and red the weakness he was not permitted to feel. His blood was not permitted.

So many things would be punished.

Bleeding would be punished. Talking would be punished, making a sound of any kind would be punished. Moving would be punished, remembering colour, remembering people or a life before…it was all punishment. It was hard to know of anything he was permitted, but thinking certainly wasn't and so he didn't let himself think anymore.

His senses improved and he had silently learnt to feel what they wanted from him. Right now, he could feel that 'they' just wanted him to stay still and even sleep.

Sleep? Was that permitted? Allowing himself that luxury seemed a rare treat and he felt someone by him again…someone touching his face…don't look, don't let them punish you again…punishment would come if he was good or if he was bad he knew that now, but it didn't stop him straining to avoid that punishment.

The 'they' he felt were new again. It was how it was. Every now and then more new 'they' appeared and punished him. Strange that 'they' didn't seem to want to punish him today. They wanted him to sleep. Would 'they' punish him if he didn't? Well that was how it would always happen. Just follow the instructions, hope that 'they' don't punish him and hope to get passed another day. Another day over. Another day to keep searching for everything he knew he was missing. Every name, place and memory. It was all here somewhere in his head. Don't let them know you are looking… don't let them think that your not trying to be good.

He deserved his punishment. He was such a disappointment to 'them' all. He would try and try and try to not disappoint anymore. It never happened though, when he felt he had been 'good' the goal posts were moved and he found himself wrapped in the clutches of punishment again.

Nobodies didn't deserve to be good. He was a nobody. Nobodies didn't deserve to think. He was a nobody, no name, no face, no memories and no thoughts.

Empty, lost and alone.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"And you were where?" The unemotional drone of Uliquorra spoke to the newest member of the Espada.

"Don't stress out. Getting rid of the body like you wanted me to." Hichigo gave the dry man his usual grin.

"You are now free from your bonds. You have a reason to be grateful to Lord Aizen."

"Yeah, that brat was a hindrance. Good riddance I say. Roll on the war, I want to show them damn shingigami my true powers." His grin widened and he cracked his knuckles. "Guess I have you to thank for finally freeing me of that burden." He recalled watching Uliquorra's hand dip into Ichigo's chest and pull free dripping with blood. It had been the injury that terminated Ichigo's time in Hueco Mundo.

"It was an order." Uliquorra turned and resumed his walk along the corridor. Higicho watched him for a moment his grin dropping into a scowl Ichigo would have been proud of.

"Just one more bastard to get even with." He said to himself. Still no one seemed to have noticed that he had taken the body to the one place he knew they'd help him. One day he would be reunited. That one day would be after he's killed the miserable bastards who thought Ichigo was theirs to do as they pleased with.

He walked along towards his own chamber and laid on the bed inside. It was a huge shock to his system to be free from Ichigo, free and independent. Something he had always dreamed of, wanted and laughed gleefully for when it was proposed. Never did he expect the huge amount of loss and despair that overwhelmed him.

Torn apart from Ichigo, he might have gained all the powers they shared, but that's not how he felt. He didn't feel the power as a bonus. The loss of Ichigo was painful. His brother was gone.

Watching them beat the living daylights out of the helpless creature the separation created was the hardest thing he had ever faced. Watching them force themselves inside the youth who could not even summon any resistance. It tore something inside him he never dreamed he was capable of. Retaliation brought punishment. Punishment he could have handled if they had taken it out on him, but they didn't. They took it out on Ichigo. Now he understood the rain he stood in most his existence. He understood feelings as he'd suffered Ichigo's for so long.

Hollows don't cry. This one didn't and wouldn't either. But Hollows do feel pain and loss. That's just how he felt lost and torn from the one thing he could have always relied on. Ichigo.

Grimmjow pushed open the door and grinned at the newest recruit.

"You know you look just like him. Its quite spooky." His evil tones rose Hichigo from his bed. He stood face on to the man daring to think he could enter without a knock. _Where was the respect? He'd beaten him to a pulp once, had he forgotten that? _

"You'll knock in future!" Hichigo hissed.

"Yeah well I was thinking about that as my hand went to do that." He came further into the room and stood only almost touching the fellow Espada. "Only as I see it… Aizen would be so happy to find out how you 'disposed' of the body. He'd love to know where it was left."

"Don't threaten me." A finger jabbed into the others chest.

"Or what? We made a deal." Grimmjow flicked the puny finger away.

"Yeah. We did didn't we." Hichigo grinned letting the other step even closer and rub his arousal against his thigh.

"Ahh, your almost making me think your looking forward to this." Grimm licked the soft pure white cheek flesh.

"And I was thinking the others might enjoy it too." Grimm looked at him surprised. "Wanna spread the word for me?"

"You think they'd want your arse do you?"

"Oh I promise them the time of their lives."

"Hahahaha, you including Aizen in that are you?" The older Espada stepped back laughing. "You really are just as full of your self as he used to be."

"Oh I'm way beyond your imagination _Grimmi…_ Just you wait until later tonight _hot boy_. This body will be more than you can handle!" Grimmjow laughed again as he left the room. This might be better than he dreamed of.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"What I don't understand is why we can't sense his usual powers. You said you were drawn to the Arrancar not the boy?" Byakuya listened to the calm medic captain as she looked through the open door to the still unmoving figure. "He was never some one who could hide his spiritual energy before."

Byakuya had returned the following day to sit and watch the boy if only for an hour. That day turned into many and now he still had not moved. Never in all his years had he been so drawn towards an individual before with such a strong desire to help them. He had been thinking of the same puzzle himself. Ichigo couldn't have learnt to control his energy in such a short time could he? But then this was Ichigo.

"Any change?" Rukia and Renji appeared and looked in at the figure of their friend.

"No none." Unohana smiled sorrowfully. "Physically there is nothing else I can do for him."

"They want to send him home don't they?" Renji guessed as he looked at his captain.

He nodded in response and looked to Unohana. "I'll look after him." It was an impulsive thing to suggest, but he couldn't bare the thought of losing him to the real world again.

"I think Isshin Kurosaki is hoping to have him home."

"His spiritual powers will not restore in time in the real world. Here surrounded by all the sprit particles he will stand a greater chance." Rukia said, she knew this from her own experiences.

"I think his family have the right to make this decision."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

As expected, the chamber door opened and Grimmjow came for the first instalment of his payment. The waiting of weeks to make the claim meant that he was all the more ready to claim it. Shame damn Aizen kept him busy for this long.

"Oi Hitici." The panther almost purred.

"Such keenness." The laughter of a watery voice came from the bathroom door. Grimm turned viewing the youth rubbing his hair with a white towel fresh from the shower. The teal eyes roamed over the naked body. Unlike Ichigo, it showed no scarring. His body was fresh and new; protected in battle by the flesh and bone of his once host who bared all the scars. The toned firm torso was invitingly tempting. It tapered off to a delicious well hung cock that sat comfortably between the firm defined thighs. "Enjoying the view are we?" The Hollow laughed turning to throw the towel into the bathroom giving Grim a good view of his arse and rippling back. When he turned back around, Grim was almost on his knees in desire and totally unprepared for the back handed strike across his face that sent him reeling across the room.

"What the fu…"

"I assumed…" Hichigo grabbed the stricken Espada by the collar and hauled him into the air. "…That you like it a little rougher than most." A grin spread across both their faces.

"Hell yeah." Grimm laughed.

_Laugh away you dumb shit. I haven't forgotten what I saw you do to Ichigo._

Grimm landed from the throw on the bed, his head cracking against the wall.

"Get your hot arse here, Hitchi!" Grimm growled and grinned as the Hollow strutted towards him baring the beginnings of his erection. He peeled off his own clothes watching as the boy laid down on the bed and waiting for him to finish. He sat in a kneel over him grabbing the erection with his clawed hand and began to pump it harshly as his teeth sunk forward into the pale flesh to make a virgin scar across his shoulder. He licked the seeping blood as finger nails ripped into his own shoulder causing to pant with pain and desire.

Bloodied lips crushed against the others in a battle for power. Tongues thrashed, as if lost in a battle to the death, breathing hitching upwards as the war continued.

Bony fingers pressed the older Espada back falling on top of him and rubbing his body against the other. His hands balled into fists and punched the face beneath him harshly. Wide grins and bloodied lips smiled back as Hichigo's teeth nicked at the flesh leading down over the ready nipples, the tensing and flinching abdomen to the navel and finally to clamp over the large bulge of need that wept waiting so desperately for attention.

Grimm growled a low rumbling moan and thrust into the younger mans mouth. The gagging causing his lips to curl and his fingers to push the face deeper down refusing release. He howled in pain and pleasure as the teeth dug into him.

Hichigo yanked himself free gasping for some air looking at the Teal mans evil grin.

A hand cracked down on the bare flesh of his face and a handful of hair later, he was back gagging over the length of flesh that threatened to force itself down his throat.

Dry fingers pushed against the tightly clasped muscle of his rear and Grimm cried out startled as the finger delved in unwanted and flashed inside him. Before he could counter attack the invasion, his mind was awash with pleasure and bucked harder into the youths mouth. More fingers, he daren't count how many writhed inside him forcing yells from him as an indescribable force flushed his seed from his body awakening his climax sooner than he wanted. His body was weakened as it crested the wave, weakened and unready for Hichigo to force his dick down inside him.

Grimm looked at the kid surprised and shocked as a grin of seed drooling evilness claimed him.

"Think I'd let you top?" The voice laughed. Grimm didn't care, the high of his climax seemed to continue in a long wave of excitement as the intrusion pressed against that magic spot repeatedly. He thrashed and groaned with each thrust and couldn't help but grab his now neglected penis harsh and pump away desperate to come again. Hitchigo laughed as Grimm yelled again, before letting himself finally release a body shattering eruption inside the others cavern.

His plan was going to work. Fool them so completely they'd let him do anything to them. Fool them into trusting him and when they finally showed the trust was complete - shatter it, break it, harm them and hurt them. One by one, he'd pick them off. One by one, they'd pay for what they did.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --


	3. A perfect loyal subject

**I thrive on reviews**, so feel free to tell me any **idea's** you have or things **you want to see happen** and I can see what I can do.

Thank you for your reviews – I aim to please so here in the next instalment all ready!

This chappie tells you all about the separation. Enjoy.

* * *

Isshin was waiting, thankful for the warning that he was getting a visitor, oh and THAT visitor too! The traditional Japanese double doors appeared in his lounge and opened to reveal the silhouette of the head of the Kuchiki clan.

The two men stood looking at each other a moment. It had been 20 years since they had last seen each other. Fleeting memories of throwing insults of an unpleasant nature passed between them.

"I never thought I would see you again." Isshin said and knowing he wished that he could have had at least another 20 years before it happens again. Byakuya looked around the humble home questioning in his mind if the sacrifice had been enough. But the worry on Isshin's face told him it had been enough for him. "They say you found him."

"Isshin, you really would be better to not know."

"I have read Unohana's report." He gestured for his guest to sit and they moved to sit looking across the dining table at each other.

"I came with a proposition. I feel he needs to stay in Soul Society."

"Seeing as he's my son, I thought that you would be eager to get him out."

"At one time I would... He has virtually no Retsui even after this length of time. To send him back here would mean his recovery would take him years. I would like you to consider him staying with me and Rukia."

"At yours?" Isshin scratched the back of his head and gave a baffled grin and Byakuya was reminded of the similarity between father and son. "Really?" _Okay Rukia was fine, he sort of thought they were an item anyway._

"You are welcome too. He might need his family around him."

"Byakuya, in the past…"

"We have not be on friendly terms Isshin. This isn't about us."

"Yet you want to take him in?"

"I have my reasons."

"No doubt you do…"

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Aizen watched his precious monitors knowing without seeing the screens who was coming into the room; although this boy had greater control over the spiritual energy than the previous owner, he still could not hide it enough to go unnoticed.

"Hichigo." Aizen turned with his impassive grin and faced the boy. "Not with Grimmjow this evening?"

Hichigo's eyes passed over the monitors in a flicker and smiled back at Aizen.

"You enjoy our little shows don't you?"

"They are interesting." Aizen's curiosity piqued as the white haired youth walked boldly up to him.

"Then maybe we could make our own show?" A finger casually traced the leaders jaw before daring to rub against his groin, teasingly showing he head a hard on. Aizen's eyes following the hand and looking coolly back up to the smirking boy.

"I don't do personal appearances."

"Then you would ideally know where we could go where there are no cameras."

"So many to choose from. Not all suitable of course." Aizen's hand brushed the bulge that stood in his eye line. Listening to the small gasp from the Espada.

"So lets try a few then shall we?" The boys voice sounded seductive and one eyebrow rose in a challenge. "There must be perks to being a God."

"Follow me." Aizen ordered him, standing and allowing his hand to caress the bulge one more time. "I think I know of the perfect place to deal with your insubordination."

The plan began to fall into place_. Sucker. _Hichigo smiled back at Aizen. _I tell you this damn revenge stuff makes me as horny as hell. _

Zangetsu nodded. #Indeed it does seem to have that effect on you.# Was the reply.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Ahh gentlemen. You've returned." The gentle Fourth Division captain smiled at Isshin and Byakuya as they entered Ichigo's room. "Everything ready?"

"What's happened?" When Isshin had returned with Byakuya yesterday. Ichigo appeared to be sleeping as he had done since his arrival. Now Ichigo sat in a chair looking blankly at the wall. His face a dead pan expression. Only the odd blink showed any movement.

"Ichigo?" Isshin sat on the bed and looked at his son with a hand on his boys shoulder. "Its me." Nothing registered. Ichigo sat looking ahead, hands in his lap.

"Stand." Unohana spoke. The two men looked in surprise as the teen stood. "Turn around." He turned a half turn. "Face forward." Again he turned back. "I realised this quite by chance only this morning. I was in here when I dropped his file. As my hands were full I could not pick it back up and was speaking to Hanataro. I simply asked for him to pick it up and we both froze as Ichigo opened his eyes, climbed out of bed and picked it up for me. I thanked him and asked him to sit. Since then every command I have given him, he has done quite literally. However I realise that this has implications too. Look."

She approached Ichigo and held out a surgical knife. "Hold this." He took the knife in his hands, she looked back to the men. "I realised that this serves a purpose if you are the captor." She looked back to Ichigo. "Put the knife to your neck." The two men gasped as the knife went with speed to his neck only stopping when it touched the skin. A fresh red trickle of blood began to dribble. "Tell him to harm himself he will. Had I said to actually cut, he I have no doubt he would have done." She said sadly. "Hand me the knife." She held out her hand and it was placed back down in her palm. She sighed and wiped the blood on the boys neck. It was only a slight flesh wound, thankfully. "We are going to need to be wary of what we say to him. I think the real world and its many forms of stimulation would be too great a risk if he choose to consider them as commands."

"Ichigo." His father spoke to him but the boy didn't move. "Ichigo!" he said louder and the boy didn't move.

"He does not recognise his name."

"Face me." Isshin said his eyes showing the pain of a father. Ichigo turned and looked blankly at the man he now faced. "Do you know who I am?" The silence seemed incredibly loud. "Who am I?" Isshin repeated.

"The command is not obvious." Byakuya grasped the concept. "What is this man's name?" Byakuya asked Ichigo directly striding next to his father.

"I do not know." Ichigo answered impassively.

"Tell me where you are." Byakuya spoke again.

"I do not know." Everyone sighed.

"You are in Soul Society this is a hospital." Unohana smiled at him. "Sit down." She looked at the two men. "A perfect loyal subject." She surmised. "Just as they planned I dare say wouldn't you?" They all agreed.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Moving Ichigo from the hospital during the day when so many people would recognise him seemed a foolish thing to do. They waiting until the death of night and Byakuya's division could secure the route to his home.

"Ichigo. Follow me." Byakuya spoke. Rukia and Renji joined Isshin and the two girls as they walked in a group from the hospital. Ichigo steps mirrored Byakuya exactly, from the place immediately behind him, literally following him. Karin and Yuzu glanced at each other with a frown at their brothers odd behaviour and followed with the group.

Half way there Yuzu could not control her desperate longing to touch her brother. She quickened her pace and reached to hold his hand looking up at him. He looked ahead accepting the hand, but his blank expression remained the same. Yuzu looked at her sister with her tears dripping silently down her face.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Your surprised?" Aizen ripped the upper garment from the panting boy. That kiss had left his legs weak.

"Your room has no cameras?" He panted his head still reeling from the kiss. _Jeez is this man good at everything?_

"Going to slit my throat are you?" Aizen asked pushing him back towards the bed.

"Now that rather depends on how good your performance is."

"Surely, that is my line." Aizen smirked at the cheek spilling from this kids mouth. Not many could get away with this and he got his retribution from a hard push down on the bed. He straddled his waist and held his head upright by a fistful of hair as he kissed him again. "I could order your death as easily as I did Ichigo's."

"What after you worked so hard to create me." He panted kissing him back.

"I can send you back if you desire." Aizen reached for restraints and began to fasten them around each of the boys wrists.

"To the fool?" Hichigo watched the fastenings being tightened to the bedposts.

"Fool or not, it's a perfect jail for you." Aizen stood to unpeel his clothing his eyes looking longingly at the kid.

"Fool or not, he's dead. Your options are limited. But let me guess, one pretty syringe from the pink haired one and I dissolve into who ever you choose."

"One pretty syringe into who ever I choose, another into you and you do yes, become jail bait inside who ever I want."

"Making a wonderful powerful enemy for the shingigami." Aizen's plan for him therefore was not to leave him as a simple independent figure for too long. This had implications on his plan.

"How did such an idiotic fool create you?" Aizen smiled.

"You know you have my thanks." Hichigo smiled. _So much information so soon. This really was a great way to fight a war. _

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Still following Byakuya, Ichigo followed him into the room that was to be his. Having wanting something that would seem familiar to him, Isshin had brought bedding, reading books, some music and photos.

"This room is yours Ichigo." Byakuya spoke to him. "The bathroom is here." He opened the door to the ensuite bathroom and gestured. "Your father has brought clothes for you. They are in here." He gestured the dressing area of the room. "This door opens to the side gardens."

The teen stared blankly. Byakuya sighed and took his shoulders.

"You must be tired. It is time to sleep." Ichigo waited until Byakuya withdrew his hands and laid flat on the bed and closed his eyes. _Yes, literal instructions indeed._ "You should have some night clothes here. Change first Ichigo." Ichigo stood as if he was a robot and for the first time looked hesitant. Just how precise did Byakuya need to be? "Undress." He said averting his eyes and turning to fish out some bed clothes.

With all his heart he wanted to give the kid some chance of decency that had obviously been lacking during his torture. He did not turn to watch him in his naked state change into the clothes. Instead he focused on pulling back the covers on the futon and lowering the lighting. When he turned Ichigo and resumed his robotic stance awaiting further instructions.

"Ichigo…" Byakuya looked at the blank eyes. He searched for anything that showed a glimmer of the real Ichigo hiding there. Nothing seemed to stand out, no flicker of acknowledgement or awareness. "Ask me a question. Any question you can think of."

"Ichigo?" he asked simply. It was the first thing that came to mind since this group of 'they' insisted on using the word so often. _What did that word mean?_

"Its you." Byakuya said. "Its your name." A slight frown showed that this didn't seem to be clear to him. "You are Kurosaki Ichigo."

"Ichigo." He tried the sound of the name then gasped waiting for the punishment. _I spoke without permission! _He cowered and shielded his face with his arms. Byakuya watched feeling his body turn to ice in horror.

"Why are you scared?"

"I spoke without permission." He whispered still waiting anxious for the pain he didn't want to feel, but having no choice but to answer the question.

"You are not allowed to speak?"

"No, not allowed. I didn't mean to I didn't…" The head and gaze had dropped into a submissive pose croaching at Byakuya's feet fearing for the outcome of this discussion.

Buakuya sighed involuntary and reached down for his hand to pull him back up on his feet.

"Your safe here, no one is going to stop you speaking if you want to speak." The face looked up slowly still wary, wishing not to fall into some kind of trap. "No one is going to hurt you here. Go to bed and sleep. Tomorrow you can ask as many questions as you want and speak as much as you want. Is that clear?"

Ichigo nodded. _Tomorrow. So tomorrow, he had a day to ask questions. A whole day to be allowed to speak!_ This person was so unlike all the other 'they'. _He never hurt me, never made me uncomfortable and now he gave me permission to talk! It was a gift._ "A whole day!" The astonished face asked.

Byakuya hesitated and recalled his words. This was harder than he expected. "No, from now on. Not just a day. Always." He said softer realising how child like Ichigo's mind now was.

Ichigo dared to allow himself a small smile as he dipped his head submissively back down. The smile was priceless. "Go to bed and sleep." Byakuya said softly leaving him.

Isshin had stood in the doorway watching. He had wanted to see how Byakuya was going to look after his son and he could not have predicted what he saw. The frosty arrogant man seemed a different person to the one he remembered. He stood aside to let the noble pass and looked back to his son. He watched him climb into bed and lay down.

Isshin walked towards the bed and kneeled on the floor beside his fragile son. The eyes closed on the peaceful looking face, already asleep. He knelt forward to kiss the teens brow.

"Sleep well Ichigo." He whispered.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Hichigo hips were ground deeply into the mattress as his leader let his last forceful thrust press him down. His body shuddered his release and Hichigo smiled as the powerful man slumped onto his back.

"You are pleased with me." He asked Aizen.

"You seek my pleasure do you?" The man panted withdrawing. "Yes. You pleased me. Please me more by staying here this evening."

"Yes Aizen-sama." Hichigo whispered letting the man pull him into an embrace.

Aizen smiled at the compliance. "Your becoming the perfect Espada. You please me very much."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Rukia thought she was one of the first to wake the following morning. Obvious sounds of movement around the house told her that the servants were already busy with their morning chores. Thinking the guests would all still be making up for their lateness to bed, it would be a perfect time to see Ichigo alone before getting ready to visit her division.

Quietly in case he was asleep, she slid open the door and stepped into the darkened room. There was a sound, a repetitive sound. Clonk, clonk, clonk… it repeated over and over. Not too hard, just persistent. She looked to the bed and saw Yuzu soundly asleep beside the bed. But Ichigo was not asleep, he was not in his bed.

The clonking sound suddenly became more urgent in her mind; she needed to discover what it was. Her eyes searched the darkness following the sounds. In the furthest corner she saw him, knees drawn to his chest tightly as he hit his head back against the wall over and over. His face still held that blank expression.

"Ichigo stop." She whispered pleading crouching beside him and noticing the smudge of blood on the wall. How long had he sat there doing that? She ran to the bathroom wetting a towel and rushing back beside him.

Trying to be good, he had stopped but he still startled with a cry as she pressed the cold stinging towel to the back of his head.

"What's going on?" Yuzu asked her frail worry evident in her tone as she woke to the sound of her brother crying out again.

"Go fetch your father Yuzu. He's banged his head." Rukia looked at the face she once knew to be strong and determined and felt a surge of hate for Aizen. "Why are you hurting yourself Ichigo?"

"He didn't come. He hasn't come… Why hasn't he come?"

"Who hasn't come, tell me who?" She asked watching his father rush towards them. Ichigo flinched at the sudden appearance and Isshin slowed and hesitated. "Ichigo, tell me who hasn't come." Rukia redirected him hoping he would talk to her again.

"Said he'd come… Said he wouldn't leave me." Isshin and Rukia frowned at each other.

"What's his name?"

"Yellow and black eyes…"

"Your Hollow?" Rukia knew the eyes. "Inside your head?"

He looked at her with wide eyes and suddenly looked incredibly scared.

A memory flashed to his mind … Ichigo screamed and panicked. He lashed out at everyone near him and moved back frantically trying to get away until his back hit the corner of the room again, looking tormented and scared to death. His hands flew to hold his head as if it hurt and a strangled scream filled the air.

Inside his mind, his memory swam frantically around –

_He was tied hands and feet to the cold steel table. The needle came for him in the hands of the horrible pink haired man. He struggled to pull his arms free from their bindings, free his legs too, so that he could at least kick out. The needle came closer and closer and he could feel the panic rising in him. _

"_Relax Ichigo. This is what I bet you've wanted. To rid yourself of that damn Hollow inside your head." The evil smile on the face of the man he only knew as the man with pink hair. _

_The long silver needle sunk deep into his arm and he screamed and writhed with pain as the burning feeling first seeped them roared around his body. His mind felt like it was expanding but his skull would not budge, the pressure built and grew. The pain ripped through him and his Hollow screamed inside him. _

"_Ichigo! Ichigo!" Hichigo screamed too, stunned by the pain._

"_Resistant little devil isn't he!" The pink haired man sneered and another needle jabbed harshly into him. _

_The burning increased almost as if his flesh was burning from the inside. His skin ripped at his binding as he convulsed and yelled with more fear and pain that he had ever felt. His head buzzed and pulsed. The pressure increased until his eyes rolled back in their sockets and with one last dire pressure filled pulse threw him into white blinding pain. Too much. It was too much. His body gave into a pain ridden shut down, his mind shut down. _

_Hichigo screamed on as he dissolved into a shimmering dust that flew from Ichigo's mind and formed a crumpled shivering heap in the bed beside his host. _

Ichigo's chest heaved with sobs and he drew in breath with desperation quicker and quicker. His heart pounded with alarm, until his eyes were open as wide as they could go and his body was screaming for oxygen.

_Make the memory stop. Make it stop! _He screamed inside his head as the memory replayed over and over.

Byakuya ran into the room waking at Ichigo's cries. The boys stricken eyes fell upon his. It was as if his soul cried out to him, 'rescue me.' He was pushing Isshin and Rukia away from him. Flinching as they tried to hold him and calm him, but instead causing him more distress. All Ichigo could remember was this long haired man had told him he could talk. He was different to all the other 'they'.

Byakuya rushed to his side as Ichigo's face turned crimson. He took the boys face in his hands and looked at him firmly stating. "Breathe!" He blew on his face to emphasise his point and made exaggerated breathing himself to get Ichigo to follow his lead.

It was too little too late. Byakuya hated himself, but he had no other option. "Sorry Ichigo." He said softly as his hand cracked over the boys cheek. He yanked the surprised face into his chest as he panted his calming sobs. But at least he was breathing. Hands gripped Byakuya's clothing tightly and his body slumped down onto the nobles lap. Exhausted his body was dragging him into sleep and the confused eyes looked at Byakuya as he fought it.

"You hit me." he panted.

"I'm sorry." Byakuya rubbed the red cheek softly. "Forgive me." Byakuya watched the eyes close and red head became limp on his lap.

Byakuya sat for some time with the teen laid on his lap, with the restful strokes that drifted down his back calming his sleep. In little time, his breathing was soft and comfortable. The hands that had gripped him tightly were now loose.

The room was silent. Each person carrying their own distress at what they had just witnessed. Each carrying a silent surprise that Byakuya was the only one who managed to calm him.

"He spoke of someone not coming for him." Rukia swallowed the hesitation in her voice. "He said he had yellow and black eyes."

Byakuya looked at her surprised.

"His Hollow?" He had obviously concluded the same thing as her.


	4. Cutting

**T**his is a chapter to have your tissue box ready. Warning this isn't nice. Features rape and self harm.

Before he can rise back up, Ichigo has to get to a point that he must rely on Byakuya to get better. So, this is going to be a little journey to hell and back.

* * *

Byakuya returned from his division and came to check up on his guests. He glanced at the still sleeping figure in the bed. After the display this morning he would have expected nothing else than to find him still asleep. His eye cast towards the door open to the garden and the figure sitting outside.

Isshin heard the footsteps approaching as he sat on the deck walkway with his feet trailing lazily in the gravel.

"The girls have gone for a walk with Rukia. They're still upset about this morning."

"This must be difficult for you all." Byakuya responding walking down the steps onto the gravel garden, picking up the rake as he passed it. "Here." He offered it to Isshin who looked at him bemused.

"…"

"You are messing up my garden." The noble stated simply. Isshin's eye cast over the rest of the gravelled area and the neatly raked pattern that snaked its way around the carefully placed shrubs, maples, and pond. He stood and accepted the rake. "Besides, I find it helps me to think clearly." The aristocrat added as he walked away.

Renji should have arrived with his paperwork by now to hep him set up a temporary 6th division office in his study.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

This time when Byakuya returned to the room, Ichigo was sitting in the chair beside the bed, his now usual blank stare looking past his sister Karin who stood hands on hips in front of him.

"Ichigo you stink. Go take a shower." He stood to comply. "Here fresh clothes." She held out some jeans and a t-shirt. The girl looked to the older man and gestured. "Dad's still doing your gardening."

"Thank you." he said simply and strolled out to see Isshin leaning against the rake admiring his neat handiwork.

"You do this a lot then?" A bearded grin asked.

"Daily."

"You always were a boring bastard." The grin said otherwise and Byakuya snorted. "So why the change in attitude towards my kid? I hear you two nearly killed each other more than once."

"You know me, I will always protect Soul Society. He was a threat… Although once I learnt his name… I was surprised by the hair."

"His mother's family." The man laughed. "Weird bunch."

The shower water dripped off his hair and stung his head, but Ichigo stood watching his reflection in the mirror. Part of him felt he wanted to relax, to let down his guard.

But part of him felt uneasy about this group of 'They'. They were so different from all the others. Confusion filled his mind, yet he didn't want to risk not being good. Doing as he was told was the only way to avoid the violence. Without his Hollow, whom he missed so much he didn't even dare use his name, he felt incredibly scared and alone. _He said he'd come for me._

Everyone around him now was a stranger. So different. They didn't even seem to be Hollows. He could only remember ever being with Hollows – _except him that man with the smile, that man who… _He forced the thought from his mind and looked at himself frowning. _I'm not a Hollow either. Is that what I look like? I didn't have a mirror in my room before…my room?_ He thought back to the place he'd been before. A white box. A white box with a shabby bed, a bucket for a toilet. The bedding was stained with his blood and smeared body fluids. The walls showed where he had been pressed against them, or thrown at. The stained floor showed more blood where he'd been left after being beaten.

There had never been any escape from the screaming of others, probably in rooms like his. That room where he was drugged and starved. That room that he shivered with cold in. That room where he dreaded to hear the footsteps approaching or the sound of the lock.

_Everyone had been a Hollow, I thought I was one too. _His hand touched the side of his face searching for a mask of bone.

_But… But… I'd had a Hollow inside me… Had. He said he'd come. Why hasn't he come?_

"Don't forget to brush your teeth and wash your hair!" Karin's voice yelled from outside the door. Karin's way of dealing with her upset was of course to pretend she wasn't. Her father, seemed to be unusually subdued and Yuzu was a complete mess – hence why Rukia had made her busy in the kitchen at the protest of the staff. No, she couldn't afford to loose her grip when everyone else had. Ichigo needed kicking in the right direction. She was going to do it.

The two men had now sat on a stone seat near the pond.

"…I was sorry to hear about Hisana. I guess that never really showed though did I?"

"No, you were too busy claiming I was still in denial." Byakuya recalled Isshin's angry tirades at him. Everyone else let him mourn, but not Isshin. He told him to grow up and face facts. Snap out of it and for pities sake admit he was gay.

"I thought you had married her out of spite."

"What because you said no? I was never in denial. I had no reason to let anyone else know what I was…am."

"I know you were pressured into getting married; I know that the rebellious guy you were back then made sure it wasn't to anyone they wanted you to be with."

"It seems my actions alienated my family and my best friend."

"You seem to have done alright out of it in the end… And Ichigo?"

"As you said the rebellious part of me…I have tried not to Isshin. I tried not to care as much as I do." They both sat in thought for a minute watching the fish and their graceful movement through the water. "Do you think your children would believe that we are the same age?"

"No!" Isshin laughed. The side effects of living in the real world and forgetting what he once was, meant he had aged as a human.

"Why haven't you told him you were a shingigami?"

"He had to chose his own path. Right now, that's even more important." The two men looked at each other and Byakuya knew he meant on a personal level now. "I don't think the girls should see Ichigo like this." Isshin confessed. Byakuya could tell this was taking a huge strain on the man to admit it. "It seems that you are the best person for him right now. I think I'll take the girls home."

He offered Byakuya a hand and they shook.

"I will keep you updated." Byakuya could not deny to himself he was relived. The girls were clearly deeply affected by seeing their brother as he was and it was the right decision. Isshin nodded a solemn nod.

"I know you'll look after him. I guess I owe you."

"What are friends for?" Byakuya said simply shutting the door on half a century of animosity.

"Dad, I can't get Ichigo out of the bathroom!" Broke their peace.

Ichigo stood hands gripping the sink. He knew he was in trouble, he'd ignored the voice outside the door. More footsteps meant they were going to be angry when they came in but he couldn't help it.

As much as he'd tried, as much as he hated it, as much as told himself, he couldn't stop seeing that man. That smile. Brown hair, brown eyes. That smile. His mind had gone back to the time they took Hichigo from him, and worst moments of waking after. Waking for the first time in his room.

_Ichigo stirred on the uncomfortable bed. His head was pounding, his wrists and ankles stung. Slowly opening his eyes he stared around. _

_Where am I? What's going on? The total panic at not remembering anything but from the moment he woke was disturbing. He had no past, he had no memories. No knowledge of who he was. It was if someone had just created him. _

_The sense of loss in his life brought him screaming to his senses. Missing…he's missing…HICHIGO! HICHIGO! He screamed over and over until his voice went horse and he'd cried all the tears a human could possess. _

_His headache pounded down on him and his weakened legs didn't allow him to reach the door and plea for release. He had to find him. _

_The door! The door was opening. Help me, I've lost him. Help me… _

_A fist swiped him across his jaw and slammed him into the wall beside him. The man was smiling at him and grabbed him by his neck. Ichigo clung to the hands that severed his flow of air as his feet kicked helplessly as they hung far from the floor. _

"_When did he wake?" The brown eyes asked the pink haired one. _

"_Not too long ago. All he has done is scream for his Hollow." _

"_And how is he?"_

"_He didn't take so long to wake as this one. He's weak but growing stronger. I think you'll be impressed. What do you want me to do with this thing ?" _

"_For the moment I just want to enjoy how pathetic he is. You can leave us." He said releasing the gasping boy who fell to the floor clutching his throat and desperately dragging air inside him. A handful of hair turned the boys gaze to the still smiling brown eyes. "Ahh Ichigo. This is such a shame hey?" The man smiled more. "Tell me, what shall I do with you?" He waited for the cheek or insolance to start. _

"_Hichigo?" He wanted to see him, he needed him. It ached so much that he was gone. This emptiness was worse than anything he could think of. _

_The wall shook, his ribs gave an unmistakeable crack as he was thrown across the room. He slid down to the floor, panting in pain. Eyes opening wide in fear as the feet moved closer to stand in front of him, his head yet again dragged up by his hair. _

"_You don't talk." The man smiled. "Unless I tell you." _

_The man smiled that unmoving smile, his evil eyes dancing in sick pleasure as he released the teen and watched how pathetic his resistance was when he raised his retsui. The kid scrabbled on the floor, hands clawing the white tiles, panting for breath that his lungs could not drawn. His stomach visibly retching, sure if he's had food in the last three days that it would now be gracing the floor. _

_Aizen smiled recalling how similar Gin had looked and yet how willing the man now was for his masters punishment. Could Ichigo get to that point? He would be the prefect pet to add to his collection. How sweet a victory to have __Kurosaki Ichigo_ _crying out for me to make him suffer more. Crying out his name looking as pitiful as he does now. _

_The man leaned down "I can crush you without even lifting a finger. So if you talk, or move or so much as bleed without my permission and I'll have you wishing you were never born. Disobey orders and I will crush you with more pain than you can imagine. Got that?" His smiled widened as the boy nodded. "Good." The pressure finally dissipated and Ichigo spluttered a mouthful of blood onto the floor. "Stand." _

_Ichigo struggled to his feet, grimacing at the pain. He faced the man who towered over him. "Not quick enough." The dead pan voice said before a blow threw him like a puppet across the room. _

_Ichigo wheezed and slid to his knees. Blood splattered on the the wall marking where his head had connected to the plaster and continued in a trail that recorded his decent to the floor._

"_Stand." The amused man repeated his command and watched the wretched child use the wall as an aid to stand. Aizen's laughter ringing out as he pushed his puppet across the room again. _

_Pitifully the creature sobbed and looked at him with huge puppy eyes pleading for it to stop. His voice wracked with words that he couldn't formulate in his pain & fear. _

_The severely tattered __black kosode white __shitagi uniform, ripped with ease from the damaged body as Aizen yanked it crudely. Cold air whipped at the hypersensitive skin beneath and Ichigo gasped clutching his arms around his body in a vain attempt to shield his naked form. _

"_Oh, so modest for one who seems to be quite fit." Aizen teased him, his hand cupping the fear frozen boys jaw and tilting it harshly up as to take in that beautiful scared face sobbing so wonderfully. The eyes closed trembling as a power crazed hand drifted over down the chilled skin pinching the nipples. A louder sob curled the smiling lips more. Now what would be the next reaction? Aizen mused as he let one hand cup the boys testicles and limp member. _

"_No!" The plea was almost silent, but Aizen still heard it. He heard it and saw the shamed face it echoed from. _

"_I did not give you permission to speak!" Aizen roared and gave one last punch on the kids shoulder. Ichigo stumbled back with force, this time the bed breaking his fall. _

_One powerful hand between his shoudler blades pinned him to the mattress, his knees cracking on the hard floor._

_Ichigo screamed at the large forceful intrusion inside his rear. He screamed so desperate at the pain that no sound actually came from his lips. _

_Aizen smirked at the blood that lubricated the virgin passage and let the sounds of pain wash over him, fueling his arousal. Thrust after thrust he pressed harder into the boy that writhed beneath him until he was completely exhausted. Quiet whimpers and sobs silenced abruptly as Aizen felt his release imminent and pushed with last minute of vigor. The pain rose the kids head in one last defiant scream before he passed out at. Aizen groaned loudly and shot his seed with a vast pulsating shudder. _

_Standing he pushed himself inside his clothing and looked down at the unmoving toy. The ultimate show of power over a defenseless human completed. He swelled his chest with satisfaction and pride in his handiwork, letting out a low chuckle that he saved for these occasions. It was so beautiful. Ichigo was so beautiful laying there, blue bruises, pink raw flesh, blood flowing from his head and down his legs. _

_This was a scene he hoped to create again. __He was a creative master and such beauty was a work of art after all. _

The knocking on the door was insistent now and Ichigo could still feel the pain from Aizen as if it had just happened. He looked in the mirror at the face he now felt hatred for & smashed his hands into the reflection. He whimpered in pain and looked at the blood beginning to dribbled down his arm. Shaking fingers picked up a shard from the sink and looked at it.

Byakuya snatched the tools from the slow moving servant as he heard the crash. He threw them down on the floor in frustration and rammed his hip against the door forcing the door open.

"Ichigo!" He saw the blood running from Ichigo's arms and looked at the teen as his continued slashing at his left arm with a shard of the mirror. "Ichigo stop!" Not caring for himself he snatched the mirror shard throwing it into the bath. "Why? Why are you hurting yourself?"

"Don't hit me!" Ichigo cried flinching as he waited for the punishment, then confusion as the noble wrapped a towel tightly around the wounded arm.

Byakuya took the boys sobbing face into his hands.

"I promise you, I'm not going to hurt you."

"Then make it go away. Make it all go away!" The head dropped, shoulders shook and the tears fell. "Make it go away."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya laid in bed. His futon would not have been in this room normally, but after today, it seemed that it was the best option to move it into Ichigo's room. If anything happened he would be right there to deal with it.

That was a good enough excuse for him.

Byakuya was almost asleep, but not quite. A shuffling in the bed near him roused him and he looked at the sheepish face of Ichigo appear beside him. His body stiffened as the teen climbed into the bed and snuggled into his shape.

"Ichigo?" He whispered. "What are you doing?" He asked at the feel of the bandaged arm against his chest.

"He still hasn't come."

"Who?"

"My Hollow."

"But he's inside your head. He's always there."

"**They** took him away." He whispered in a shiver as the memory gave a brief flicker in his mind. The voice sounded pathetic. "He hasn't come."

"What does he do when he comes?" Byakuya didn't want to ask the question as he feared the answer he would be given.

"… Makes **them** go away..." The voice was so quiet, he barely made the words out. A surge of painful love and caring stabbed at Byakuya and he sighed slightly dealing with the intense emotion he so rarely allowed himself. Ichigo's Hollow kept him safe. The implications of that seemed bizarre.

Byakuya tugged the cover over the teen and wrapped his arm around the boys back. How could he push away this trust that had been thrust upon him so soon. A trust he didn't want to push away whilst at the same time, one he didn't want to take advantage of. As much as he would want Ichigo willingly in his bed, he wanted a lover who acted upon free will.

Ichigo was a child right now. A child who needed support, understanding and safety. His vow of protection threw those at the orange haired youth gladly.

He rubbed the boys back soothingly.

"Promise me Ichigo, you won't hurt yourself again." The boys head nodded. "Sleep. I'll stay with you."

They lay quietly together. Both lost in thoughts from the far end of the spectrum of possibilities, but finding it comforting at being so close.

Ichigo felt so confused by everything that was happening to him. _Where was he? Where were the all the other 'They'? _ No one he knew was around him anymore; not the one with blue hair who had come to him during the night. There wasn't even the green eyed one who hurt his chest. The pink haired man, nor the man who always smiled. No one. He didn't miss them. He didn't miss being hit, hungry or forced; but he missed his Hollow.

_He looked after me. He promised to take me somewhere safe… Is this the place? But he promised he'd come and get me. He'd promised me._

"Do you know where my Hollow is?" Byakuya didn't think that Ichigo had fallen asleep, but he wasn't prepared for the question out of the blue.

"Hueco Mundo."

"Why's he there?"

"That's where the Hollows live."

"I'm not a Hollow?"

"No." Byakuya paused at that unusual question. "Did you think you were?"

"The mirror…I saw myself."

_What did they do to you Ichigo? _

"When's he coming?"

"I don't know."

"He said he'd come back for me!"

"Sleep Ichigo. He's not coming tonight."

Gradually as he listened to him, Ichigo finally fell sleep. His breathing fell into a restful steady rhythm and his body laid comfortable against the sleek pale figure. In his hand, clenched tightly, a tuft of long dark hair.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --


	5. Clueless Renji

I find Renji a really funny character – clueless and always angry. So I really enjoyed writing his clueless moments in this chapter.

Thanks for your reviews, it really does help to focus on writing more.

Renji carried the wad of papers into the Kuchiki Mansion and the new division office.

"Taicho." Renji said standing at the door and glancing at the figure of Ichigo sitting in a chair near by, looking it seemed, peacefully out at the garden. Byakuya indicated the empty spot on his desk for the new batch of papers.

"You can take those away with you." The captain indicated the completed pile he had finished earlier.

This was the pattern that they had fallen into for the past three days. Renji wondered if the view was that good. This certainly was the quietest he had ever know Ichigo.

"Good morning Ichigo." Renji said cheerfully as he had the past few days, but got no response as usual. He looked to his captain with a sad look.

Byakuya placed his brush down.

"Would you like to stay for some lunch Abarai?" Renji tried to hide his look of surprise at his Captains invitation and nodded.

"Thank you Taicho."

"Good, sit and finish my paperwork for me." He heard as his captain who had turned to walk to Ichigo. Renji spluttered and coughed and looked at the masses of paperwork. He had enough of his own back at he division office and now having to run back and forth to the mansion was just adding to his work load. Byakuya reached Ichigo's side and looked to his Lieutenant. If Renji didn't know better he would have said the man was smiling. "I have a captains meeting in half an hour. If you wouldn't mind staying here for me?"

"Of course."

"Ichigo I need to go out for a little while. Stay with Renji." The boy nodded. Renji bowed in respect as the captain passed him. "Just stay with him. Where ever he goes. I mean where ever." Byakuya placed a hand on the mans shoulder and spoke quietly. "Oh and Renji? Please, don't do my paperwork."

Renji bent to look out the window at the height Ichigo was looking and frowned.

"Never took you as a garden lover." Ichigo's eyes looked towards him and Renji gave a impish grin. "Aren't you bored sitting there day after day?"

"No." Renji stood and looked the kid up and down.

"What did you do to your arm?" He looked at the bandages and sat on the floor legs crossed leaning against the wall.

"I cut it." He said looking at the bandages.

"No? How did you manage that?" Well it was the start of a conversation so he decided to go with it. Having not seen him since he arrived here that dark night, it was a good chance to catch up.

"I broke a mirror."

"Oh. I bet Byakuya was mad at you for that."

"No."

"If it was me, he would have torn my head off!" Renji half laughed. "How did you get away with it? Six, seven weeks ago, he would have torn yours off too!"

Ichigo frowned. Renji wondered at the confused expression.

"He always used to try and get rid of you quicker than you could set your feet inside Seireitei. I think he was scared you wanted to marry his sister!" Renji chuckled.

"I don't know what…"

"Nah, it don't bother me if you two like each other; she's like a sister to me. Rukia and I go way back, truth be know if it wasn't for her, I'd be dead by now. I wouldn't have made it through childhood let alone the academy."

"Can I go and sleep now?" Ichigo asked sounding more like a scared rabbit than a shingigami. What ever this man was talking about, Ichigo felt uncomfortable. It was as if he seemed to think they knew each other and Ichigo felt that vast missing feeling keenly with each passing sentence.

"I… Err… I guess so." Renji shrugged and getting to his feet.

Ichigo laid on the double futon and Renji opened the side door. It was a nice hot day and he thought the breeze would be good.

"Hey you got to bring your stuff with you." Renji picked up the music CD's. He flipped through them smiling at recalling the nights spent in Ichigo's room avoiding going back to Urahara's for as long as possible. "I liked this one. Oh and that one." He looked smiling over the figure who had rolled away from him and curled in a ball. "Home from home hey?" He noted the duvet cover on the single futon as he sat on the blue and white Quincy cover. "Oh look photos too!" He did a double take. _Second bed?_ "Hey whose bed is that?"

"The man you call captain." And if it wasn't clear enough already that he wanted to escape, Ichigo rolled over away from him.

_Well, well, well._ Renji smiled. _The captain is a soft hearted bastard after all_. "Isn't he going to be mad at you for messing up his bed?"

"He said I could sleep here."

"I guess its not as if he's using it." Renji shrugged. "I got to pee. Can I use your bathroom?"

"Your asking me?"

"Don't get defensive! God you never change. I only wanna pee! I ain't going to run away with it!" Renji tutted. "Can I use it or not?" _Damn freeloading shit just follows me around! _

"Yes." Ichigo felt the unmistakable signs of a headache with all this uncertainty.

"Hey you ain't got a door on it!" Renji yelled over to him then spotted the remaining half of the mirror that stayed intact on the wall. "What happened…" He began to pee into the loo. "…Byakuya knock it down when you broke the mirror?" He laughed loosing his aim as his joke was confirmed as the truth. "Oh shit." He looked at the wet floor. He bent with a handful of toilet paper and began to wipe the floor.

"Did you miss again?" Rukia laughed putting her head inside the bathroom.

"Rukia! You don't just walk in on a guy in the bathroom!" She laughed at his indignation. "A minute earlier and…"

"Nah, seen it all before, it doesn't interest me." She laughed leaving him and sitting on the double bed next to Ichigo. "Anyway, I could hear you a mile off, and I bet your keeping Ichigo awake?" She looked at the closed eyes of the orange haired friend. Her hand rested on his shoulder and patted it as if he were an infant.

"Oi what do you mean you've seen it before!" Renji strode over with affront across his face.

"Quieted down." She said looking at him gesturing towards the sleeping teen. "Where is my brother?"

"Captains meeting."

"Well then you'd better shut up and be quiet before he comes home and finds you yelling your head off in his house." It was sensible advise and Renji tutted getting comfortable on what should have been Ichigo's bed. He picked up the photo's again and thumbed through them quietly.

"Isshin almost looks normal in these." Renji scoffed. "Ahh look at baby twinnies." He held the photo out for Rukia to see. "What's all this don't leave him alone business?" He whispered.

"The mirror." She replied. "He used it to cut his arm to shreds." Renji's eyes opened wide. Surely he heard that wrong?

"Why?"

"Who knows? He doesn't say anything that makes sense to us. He just gets these times when everything just seems too much…its scary as shit." She gave Renji a half hearted smile. "I'd like to rip Aizen's balls off and stuff them down his throat personally."

Renji unconsciously crossed his legs.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya walked into the room and stood in his usual position in the meeting room. Glances his way told him they all wanted to know how Ichigo was doing, but as the Commander-General appeared their opportunity was lost.

The noble listened as intently as always, he made it's job to be aware of everything happening in the Gotei 13; even if the respective captains did not deem it worthy to stay awake.

The war preparations were discussed and new orders issued. Permission for a capture of an Espada for experimental purposes denied – It was beyond even Byakuya's comprehension that any experiments were worth the risk of the lives of them men it would take to capture one.

"That is unfortunate." Mayuri Kurotsuchi's shrill tones echoed in the room before the meeting could be adjourned. The captains all looked back at the misshapen man. "Then may I be permitted to find out why the ryoka Kurosaki Ichigo no longer had any spiritual energy?"

"Soul Society recognised that he was not a ryoka many months ago Mayuri." The voice drifted out from under the straw hat.

"I think that my patient has undergone enough 'research' experiences during his time at Hueco Mundo. It would not be conducive to his healing." Unohana spoke softly to the whole room much to Byakuya's relief.

"That is as maybe, but it doesn't answer our question." The evil man persisted. If he couldn't get what he wanted, then he'd just be awkward for something else instead.

"I have not seen him, how is he doing Byakuya?" Kyōraku enquired. "Maybe we could visit and cheer him up?"

"It took Rukia several months to regain her spiritual energy. It seems that he will need the same consideration." Is all Byakuya wanted to say on the matter.

"Could I have a report on his progress" The Sotaicho asked.

"I will get to it right away." Byakuya bowed.

"Surely we need to know everything that happened to the ryoka whilst he was with the enemy. He could be a spy, the man is a Vizard after all." Mayuri cut above everyone else silencing the room.

"Then I can clarify that he no longer is a Vizard. From what I understand, Aizen isolated and removed the Hollow." Byakuya looked directly at the 12th division captain. "Making him rather useless to your investigations I believe?"

"Oh." The hat and the man looked thoughtful.

"This meeting is dismissed." The old Sotaicho announced.

Byakuya looked to the peace loving straw hat wearer as he approached him to leave the room. His hand was placed on the captains shoulder. "Steady yourself Byakuya. Your not the only one unwilling to release the boy to that mad man." It was a sign that Byakuya had obviously been close to losing his calmness. His life long training of nobility failing him when it came to a matter close to his heart. The gentle pat reassured him and he nodded to the older man thankful for his support.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

The lunch was prepared and ready almost as if the servants had some inner knowledge as to the exact time the head of the house was due to arrive. Byakuya stepped shoe less into his house, feeling a relief of home and nodding his thanks to the announcement of lunch, just as he heard Rukia sensing his retsui arrive running from the sleeping quarters.

"Nii-sama! Its Ichigo again."

Renji sat a little mystified as to why Rukia was so keen to find her brother when it became evident that their friend was slipping into a nightmare.

He did as told and took her place on the bed beside the teenager.

Apart from the odd call of 'No.' It seemed like a typical type of nightmare, even Renji got at times, usually surrounding getting shredding by Byakuya and his Senbonzakura for not completing his paperwork on time.

"Oi." Renji shook the boy. "Its just a dream mate."

Chocolate eyes flew open as he jolted from the shake.

"Hey. Alright?" Renji tried one of lesser used compassionate smiles.

Ichigo shot back off the edge of the bed towards the corner of the room he had used before. He knees drew up to which he clung desperately and flinched as Renji closed in just mystified. "Hey its just me. What's got you spooked?"

"No. Don't." The kid seemed to be looking right through Renji. Renji reached out with his hand to touch Ichigo on the shoulder and stopped short when Ichigo blanched and almost appeared to climb up the wall shrinking away with an anguished cry to avoid the touch.

"That must have been some nightmare." Renji said aloud. As the other two ran back into the room.

"What did you do?" Rukia accused him as Ichigo once he set his eyes on Byakuya bolted out of the corner and flew towards the captain.

Catching him by the upper arms the Byakuya spoke in his calm tone.

"Ichigo. It was just a dream."

The boy shook his head and looked worried back at Renji before resuming his usual questioning.

"When's he coming? Make him come now." The face fell when he realised that he would only get his standard answer. "He said he'd come." Byakuya wanted to let the now sobbing kid into his arms. "Why did he leave me here?"

"Because your safe here." Byakuya lifted the face and looked into the sad eyes. "Even that buffoon over their would never hurt you Ichigo, you have to believe me. Would I have left you with him if I thought he would hurt you?" The boy sniffed and looked at him shaking with the after affects of the dream. "What was your dream about?"

"The green haired cat one."

"Grimmjow." Renji sneered. Ichigo jumped at the name. The memory of hearing it used startling him. "What did that evil bastard do to you?"

"Renji." Byakuya glared at his lieutenant.

"He came when everyone was asleep." The confession came out quietly. "Unless my Hollow was there. He would come." More sobs started. "I didn't like it, I didn't but I would be punished…If I didn't let him…" The flash of fear in his eyes was real as the painful fingers digging into Byakuya's arms. The boy shook his head. The moments of being able to talk about it were gone.

"Its alright Ichigo. Its all gone now." The softer well spoken tones soothed and let the boy fall into his chest.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Rukia. What was all that shit earlier? I mean…he hugged him. This is Ichigo and your brother we're talking about!"

"Don't forget he's just a kid when all said and done. Right now, he's hurting really bad… Nii-sama is just trying to protect him like you would any kid. It was a hug that's all."

"Yeah from your brother that's like the earth changing orbit."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Are you asleep?" Ichigo whispered into the dark locks of hair.

"What is it?" Byakuya didn't think he could take another dose of questions regarding the appearance of that damn Hollow and remain patient.

"Renji."

Well, Byakuya could have predicted that it was that loud mouthed yob who upset Ichigo.

"He said some things."

_Oh this was going to priceless_. Byakuya thought.

"I've always been Ichigo… I know that I've forgotten everything… I didn't live here, because you wanted to get rid of me each time I visited. The real me, you don't like me really?"

"Its not that at all."

"Was I in love with your sister?"

"I don't honestly know. I thought you were, but she says not. You were just friends apparently."

"Why can't I remember anything before?"

"Captain Unohaha says that its possibly just a way your brain is trying to protect you. Everything that happened to you was too painful and so your mind, if you like, closed a gate to stop you hurting anymore."

"Then if I'm safe here… It should come back?"

"Hopefully. There's nothing you can do to make it happen. You just have to let yourself heal Ichigo. All your memories will come back just as all your memories of Hueco Mundo feel less painful over time…What else did Renji say?"

"That you would have been mad about the mirror before this happened to me."

"I was mad but not at you. You didn't do this to yourself. I'm mad at those that did this to you."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

* * *


	6. He’s come for me!

**Hello – I'm back! **

"Taichō?" Renji knelt respectfully before his captain.

"Abarai?" Byakuya said nothing more, it was always better that way to let the man squirm in his own torment. It was usually more humorous that way. He continued his work leaving the scarlett headed man in his own torment for a while.

"Where is Ichigo?"

"At division 4 for the moment."

"Is he okay?"

"Captain Unohana wanted to check him over."

"I mean is he okay?" The noble looked up and waited for Renji to clarify the okay. "Its just that when he woke…."

"When you woke him…"

"Yeah, well… He was scared of me."

"The boy was tortured to the point that he has no memories of his former life, remembers no one and arrived here almost taking his last breath. I think that would be enough don't you?"

"But.." More silence from the piercing stare. "He trusts you. I mean you weren't exactly buddies before and that. I don't think he would normally…or you would normally have…"

"What should I do when faced with a worried child?"

"…" The lieutenant bowed and went to leave the room.

"You know Kurosaki. He is infuriatingly good at getting people to respond to him." He heard as he left. He paused and turned and looked at his captain who seemed to have said nothing at all. "Pardon?" He looked up as if it had been Renji that said that last sentence.

"Nothing sir." He said replied leaving the room before allowing a smile. _Well, I guess that proves it, he does have a heart._

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

The gravel looked preened beautifully as Byakuya dragged his rake along a curve around the pond's edge. He glanced up at Ichigo, sitting on the wooden deck edge as his father had done a week or so ago. He looked calm and for once thoughtful himself as he sat watching Byakuya tend his garden.

_What was the next step with him?_ By now the trust was firmly established. That alone made the 6th Division captain feel happy. That had allowed him to have the teen closer than he'd ever before imagined or honestly wanted. He was thankful that it didn't seen at all stifling difficult to have this constant presence. _If Ichigo did recover to his full self, that cheeky, disrespectful, impulsive person, would I still feel this easy having him around all the time? Byakuya, you stupid fool, he wouldn't stay around would he? He has a life in the real world. You know, as you've always known he doesn't belong here. It isn't his time to be here yet. _

Byakuya felt a pricking sensation on the back of his neck. A presence, defiantly a powerful Hollow…Ichigo's Hollow? There was a strong sense of Ichigo in the retsui.

Ichigo was up and running before Byakuya could react. At least in his powerless state he was greatly hampered in speed. Byakuya had chance to grab him and stop him as he neared the orchard.

"Its him!" The excited eyes danced. A hopeful look spread across his features.

"You can feel him too?"

"He's come for me!" The teen pulled at the restraining hand.

"Ichigo think! Where can he take you? Not back there, you don't want to go back there!"

"He's come for me!" Ichigo pulled away and began running again. Byakuya quickly caught him again and stopped him.

"Wait. Let me come." Ichigo threaded his hand into his and nodded. Unused to this form of touching Byakuya paused but Ichigo dragged him on.

"Ichigo!" Hichigo gasped. Seeing the red hair running towards him. He had wanted to get out before he'd be found, but a sense of relief that his King was alive was deniably pounding in his chest.

Byakuya held the boy back looking carefully at the Hollow incarnation of Ichigo. Other than the white colouring, he was identical. His eyes cast down the twin to the other Hollow at his feet. Blood splattered the clothing but the teal hair was unmistakable. Grimmjow.

"Let me go!" Ichigo clawed at Byakuya's tight grasp on his hand.

"No Ichigo." Hichigo spoke. "I haven't come to get you." The boys face fell and he sagged noticeably.

"You promised."

"I have things to do first. Stay here. Stay safe." He held up placating hands and his eyes cast down at the fallen Hollow.

"Is he dead?" Byakuya asked.

"I'm going get them for what they did to Ichigo." The anger rose in this voice and he kicked the body. "I'll kill them all before I'm done."

"Why are you doing this? You're a Hollow?"

"Because they tore us apart. Because they hurt him the way they did … Byakuya, thank you for keeping my brother safe."

_A Hollow with feelings? This was a new concept to the existing knowledge Byakuya had. He'd thanked me too. _"Brother?"

"What else could we call ourselves? We came from the same flesh. We grew from the same seed. Look after him."

Ichigo yanked harder at the hand holding him back, he wanted to be with Hichigo. He want to be together again! "NO! You can't leave me!"

"Wait! There's so much we don't understand." Byakuya watched the rip open.

"I have to go, if they notice I'm gone…"

"Don't leave me again!" Hichigo looked at the tears beginning to fall down his brothers face and gave him a small smile.

"I'll come again I promise you." He gestured a small wave, nodded his appreciation to Byakuya and stepped back into the dark rip.

A scream echoing from Ichigo's belly ripped from him fiercely. He swiped the sword out of Byakuya hilt hand and charged for the dead body of Grimmjow.

The noble felt the men of his division closing in and the pain that was rippling from Ichigo as he furiously stabbed and slashed the cold body was palpable. But there was a purpose to not disarming the kid right away.

"He's dead Ichigo! Ichigo he's dead already!" Byakuya pulled the shaking, frustrated Ichigo away holding him by his upper arms.

"Captain!" Men from the 6th ran towards them staring amazed at the fallen Espada and the bloody sword in the red heads hands.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya took Ichigo by his shoulders and led him back to his room.

"I'm going to have to write a report on what just happened Ichigo. Will you be okay while I go to the office?" Ichigo nodded his response. Byakuya could tell that the kid was still reeling from the disappearance of his brother. An uneasy feeling sat within him, he wanted to stay and make sure that he was okay, but the report needed to be written quickly before the rumours got around the town and misinformation got back to the Commander-General.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Where is grimmjow?" Aizen asked as Ulquiorra as the saddened looking man entering the large throne room.

"No one can find him. It seems we can't find Hichigo either Aizen-Sama." It was unnerving for the loyal servant not to complete a task set to him by his Lord. But a personal search and a retsui one provided him with no knowledge as to the where-a-bouts of the pair.

Aizen got off his chair and thought a moment. There was one place the teen Hollow could be without being found. The one place even Ulquiorra would not venture. He strode off down the maze of white corridors and pushed the door open to his own chambers. He eyes cast around the room and feel on the bed. His smiled widened slightly as he approached the bed.

"How long have you been here?" He asked the teen.

"Er…Hey. Sorry what?" Hichigo faked waking and looked at the man with a bemused smile. "I must have fallen asleep."

"Grimmjow?"

"Yeah? What you wanting that threesome after all?" Hichigo smiled.

"You would do that for me?"

"Well I'd move in here but you haven't asked me yet!" Aizen snorted at his cheek.

"When you learn respect, then maybe I will." Aizen knelt on the bed and leaned forward holding the boy down by his shoulders.

"When hell freezes hey?" Hichigo grinned and watched Aizen close in pressing his open mouth against his.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

The report took around an hour and sent off with a runner from his division. Byakuya turned into the room and stalled as he realised Ichigo hadn't moved a single muscle.

"Ichigo?"

He looked at the face, emotionless and staring blankly ahead. He had been fooled into thinking the boy was further through his recovery than he thought?

_What had he confessed in the hours late last night? How he coped with the abuse. How it was easier to stand there quietly, closing his mind, closing his feelings, shutting down everything in order to survive. Do exactly as told, saying nothing. Surviving. _His mind went back to the day he found him standing there. Just standing with a blank expression_. That's what he'd been doing, just surviving. And now, was he now just trying to do the same thing? _

Byakuya touched him lightly on the shoulder. "You can talk and move freely here remember. This is your room." The cold eyes swivelled to turn to him.

"He's gone again." The voice was enough to tear at his composure. That broken vulnerability so obvious again.

"He said he would come back."

"Byakuya…" It was the first time he had used his name and the noble felt a stab of pride that he did now. "Those men said like old times… they knew me."

"You are a hero in their eyes. A man who could save them from the espada like Grimmjow."

"It all hurts." The random statement echoed around the room.

"What hurts?" Byakuya frowned and took the shoulders in his hands and rubbed them with care.

"Here." He touched his chest. "I… that man… Grimm… It all still hurts."

"Time will make it better. Don't let it stop you remembering who you really are."

"Where we friends before?" Byakuya lead him towards the bed and sat him down then settled beside him.

"You have lots of friends Ichigo. But… well we both have scars Ichigo we gave each other. I'm a proud man who doesn't loose…I don't lose, I never did, until you. I have a lot to thank you for."

"You thank me because I beat you?"

"You gave me a perspective on life that I did not have before. I've already lived many more lifetimes than you will have. I've done lots of things, but I'd stopped caring, stopped doing anything but my duty. That was all I was, a walking rule book. Saving Rukia, you showed me a life I wanted again. You gave me a purpose."

Ichigo looked thoughtful staring down at his hands. He watched the graceful hand of Byakuya close over his own and tighten. The action felt good. Welcome.

"I won't leave you." Ichigo registered the voice and the arm that pulled him into the others chest. The chest that cradled his nightmares each night.

Byakuya's eyes widened in surprise as the boy looked at him, the close proximity was stiflingly hot. His heart racing. Ichigo leaned forward and placed a kiss on his lips. Not a quick peck, but not a passionate consuming one either. Just tender, lingering and loving.

Ichigo placed his head back on the shoulder and felt a warm hand caress his hair gently. He closed his eyes feeling the safest he had for a long time. Allowing himself to feel his wants and act upon them. For some reason he knew finally that it would be okay to show what he wanted. To have what he wanted. To give in.

This was his safe place. This was his freedom, his brother had given him. He _could_ let his guard down. He _would_ let his guard down.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

That Evening.

The 5th squad men, their duty over looked gleefully at their glasses of sake. The four men had all something on their minds. The first spoke.

"So what happened then, you saw the two of them standing over a dead Espada." He's arrived at the sight a moment after the others.

"Yeah he was number 6 apparently…" The second began to answer then sipped his drink

"So who killed the Hollow? Do you really reckon it was Kurosaki?" The third asked.

"I think it was Kurosaki. He had the captains sword in his hand, it had to be him." The fourth answered.

"The guy was weird, did you see the way he looked?" The first shivered.

"He was damn quiet. Byakuya did all the talking." The third frowned. "He looked shit, really shit."

"You'd look shit having had a fight with one of them guys you idiot!" The Second scoffed.

"Byakuya ordering kuosaki around like that, and the guy just took it. I bet he was just pissed that our captain was talking all the glory." The forth downed his glass in one and grabbed the bottle to refill it.

"Well it's a known fact that there is no love lost between those two!" The first nodded. They all nodded.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

* * *


	7. Your choice

**Bold** is Zangetsu

_**Bold italic**_ is Hichigo in his inner world

' ' is Ichigo talking in his inner world.

Well this is going to be a huge leap in his recovery today. You know you want it!

Thank you for your review, do keep them coming, it really does help and makes it all worthwhile.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Rukia was never minded being with Ichigo as her brother rushed his way through his mounds of paperwork or meetings. She'd heard the rumours and the official line on what happened two days ago, but knew the truth when Byakuya told her.

Today, the weather was perfect and with her arm linked in the ginger teens, they walked slowly around the Acers in the far garden. The stream beside them was calming and the whole place so tranquil. If she ever had to choose a favourite part of the garden this would be it.

They stopped on the arching wooden bridge and Ichigo watched her take off her shoes and dangle her feet into the cool water. She looked up at him smiling.

"Go on it feels lovely."

She was right, the water was magical and cool. Relaxing and stimulating. He sighed and forced the thoughts of his meeting with his brother from his mind. It didn't matter how many times he went over it, he'd gone away. But…

But, well now, he had Byakuya. So different from his brother, but just as caring. That strong pull he'd felt towards the man must have meant all along that he knew he was safe with him. Some inner knowledge finally dislodged to let him know his feelings were more for the man. Did that mean his memories were also going to follow soon?

"Your brother means a lot to you doesn't he?" Rukia asked. Ichigo nodded. "Ichigo you have a choice don't you. Listening to you yesterday, its obvious that Hichigo left you here as he thought it was safe. Your choice is to stay as you are holding onto your pain because that's easy or facing what's coming head on, like the Ichigo I know you are."

"What I've been through… Its not that easy."

"What do you gain from staying like this? What do you want?" He shrugged in answer.

"Did your brother like me before?" She sighed and looked at the water running past her feet for a moment thinking of a way to phrase this.

"In his own way, yes he did. When he found you, he was so worried about you. And now…you know now. I've never seen him spend so much time with anyone else, even me." She smiled. "He looks at you like you are the special to him." She put an arm around his shoulders and nudged him. "Like him too do you?"

"Is that wrong?"

"No." She laughed. "But its…great you do."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya arrived in the guest room, he now saw just as much as his own and looked at Rukia leaning against the door looking out.

"Good day?" He asked standing next to her and smiling at seeing Ichigo with the rake in his hand tending the garden.

"What have you done to that kid?" Rukia laughed. "He's gardening. You know when he gets his memory back, he's going to want to kill you."

"We'll see."

"He said to me today, that he likes you." she watched for a reaction out of the corner of her eyes and saw him smile again.

"Who is filling who's head with nonsense?"

"You like him too."

"Rukia."

"Rukia me as much as you like. I finally feel I can say what I want to you."

"That's how you repay my kindness of bringing you into the family?"

"You make a nice couple." She reached up on tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "I'm happy for you."

He looked at her with his cool gaze and then nodded.

"Thank you." They both looked back at the teen who'd stopped working.

Ichigo frowned slightly. He stood holding the top of the rake and closed his eyes. He looked around him up at the tall blue buildings that towered around him and turned a complete circle feeling the huge fat water droplets land on his face.

There was movement either side of him and he looked firstly to the left and a pair of glass doors, then right to the mirror image. There were no doors anywhere else. Just these two.

**Choose. **

'Who are you?' Ichigo looked at the tall long haired man and his tatty black and white robes that had appeared in the middle of the street.

**You know my name. We will not repeat what we have done before. Choose. One signifies the future, one the past. One will bring you nothing, the other will take you home. **

Ichigo heard banging. He turned to his left and saw Hichigo banging on the door. Tugging at the handle unable to open it. He was shouting, but Ichigo couldn't hear the words.

He turned unsure to the door on the right and saw Byakuya standing there. He wore no emotion and did not move. The eyes looked at him, unreadable but the feeling of safety seemed to emanate from them.

'I want both of them.'

**Choose. **The old man said before fading away.

Ichigo turned left to right, left to right. He ran to the door with Hichigo pressing his hands against the glass screaming.

'Hichigo!' He pushed and pushed but his brother wouldn't let him in. Hichigo shook his head and rested it against the glass. Ichigo pressed his against his side of the glass. He pointed a finger towards the other door, turned his back and walked away. 'Hichigo!' Ichigo screamed again. He ran back from the building looking up at the windows vainly trying to see if he would appear again somewhere else. His eyes searched each window. Nothing. His heart pounded in his chest and he fell breathless to his knees. Tears mingling with the rain drops on his cheeks.

'What am I without you?' He cried.

_**Anything you want to be.**_ The voice drifted around him in swirls lifting him to his feet and turning him towards the other doors. _**Let go of that fear. Fear has always held you back. In your past, you only achieved greatness by letting go of that fear. **__**Remember what it felt like before I came. **_The voice faded away and Ichigo looked ahead. He saw the door and the figure waiting there.

As he looked through the glass, he could see Byakuya further back now in the room. But behind the door seemed to be a million images fluttering, shimmering, twisting and gliding. Ichigo placed his hands on the handle of the door and the images all stopped and seemed to look towards him. One deep breath and Ichigo pushed the door open.

The images all tore with speed towards him, covering his body, pressing into his mind. Images of his life, his school, his family…Aizen and the hundreds of Hollows and battles he'd had. Kisuke and his friends…There were so many and they were so heavy. His felt his body being pressed down by the weight of it as his eyes looked to Byakuya his hand stretched out struggling to reach him.

Byakuya and Rukia, rushed forward as they saw Ichigo grip the sides of his head and scream out in pain.

"Bya…kuya…." He whimpered as the man caught him before he fell to the floor.


	8. Memories

**Bold** is Zangetsu

' ' is Ichigo talking in his inner world.

Sorry for the delay in this story, if you like my stuff, I have another two on the go. Your more than welcome to have a peep at them! Your comments for this story are great. I am happy that you are enjoying it.

This isn't a very long update as my mind seems concerned with the ending more at the moment. I need some time to think of the bits in-between!

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

A hand each clung desperately to the two people who were guiding Ichigo softly to the floor. His eyes were screwed tightly shut as the recalled pain of so many emotions rolled over him. He groaned and thrashed his head with each flash of memory that spasmed across his mind.

Rukia looked to her brothers calming influence, her own emotions rushing around like a wild child. As she'd expect, he looked calm, emotionless and considering his options.

"What do we do?"

"Wait." Byakuya forced the clenched hand off his scarf and unravelled the length of fabric from his neck and folded it into a pillow.

"But he's in pain."

"Be patient Rukia." Rukia didn't have the patience to kneel and wait like her brother did. Watching him agonise internally tore at her insides and worried her to the core. He was hurting. It was always her fault. Her fault a she forced his powers from him whilst still alive, so many years before they should have been realised. She had stolen his life from him.

Gradually she felt his grip on her relax. His heavy breathing began to subside and he opened his eyes slowly.

Ichigo looked at Rukia. _RUKIA!_ All the associated memories seemed to suddenly fit into place, an understanding of who she was and how she fitted into his life. There was a past life of memories that made her real.

"Rukia." He gave her a weak, confused, apologetic smile. "Your still having to protect me."

"Cos, your always such an idiot!" She smiled back down at him rushing to wipe the tears that gave away how much she cared for the moron who was her best friend.

"Can you stand?" Byakuya's voice and presence dipped into his conscience and he turned his head again having that déjà-vous experience. It was a confusing rush of emotions that hit him like a wall. All the images and past memories stung of arrogance and rejection, but they were tainted with his patience, concern, care and affection of his recent memories.

Byakuya asked the question again, unsure of the scrutiny with which Ichigo was staring at him with. A real fear gripped him that he was watching the demolition of his relationship with Ichigo. His calm calculating mind, knew the teen was going to need time to adjust. He had no right to claim Ichigo as his. But he wanted to.

"Byakuya." Ichigo whispered as his mind hesitated on the vision of the glass doors. The strength and promise that emanated from the man back then was a minor reflection to the emotions he could read behind the expression now. The eyes that clung to him reeked of worry and … love.

If there was a race of emotions in his own mind right now, looking at this powerful man, it was love that was winning. It ran, head and shoulders in front of the others, stood taller and made more demands to be recognised than any other.

"Can you stand?" Byakuya's question finally understood, Ichigo nodded after a mental sweep of his body. His only complaint was a pounding headache.

Ichigo pushed back the hands that steadied him on his feet. Although he swayed ever so slightly and his assistants seemed reluctant to step too far back, but Ichigo needed to do this alone. He closed his eyes and drifted back into his inner world and felt the familiarity of the place touch his senses.

'Old man?' He called out.

**You know where to find me.** Was the response. **You know how to call me.**

'Zangetsu!' Ichigo refused to yell it with the enthusiasm his mind wanted to. The ability to remember so much was exhilarating, but he was the master, he commanded his sword not the other way around. A flurry of wind swept around his ankles and the incredible presence appeared on his perch. The black robe swirled at his feet and his hair fluttered in the breeze. His stare was cool and calm as Byakuya's yet the differences of a beard and shades so different.

Ichigo took his time and allowed him a smile. Was everything going to be compared to Byakuya? Even in this place that was his alone?

**Ichigo.**

'My powers. Does Hichigo have them all?'

**Your powers are yours because they come from your spirit not his. He could not take what was not his.**

'Then how do I….?'

**Remember.**

With a few deep breaths, Ichigo closed his inner eyes and thought back.

"Nii-sama? Is he okay?" Rukia looked on concerned for the last twenty or so minutes that Ichigo had stood swaying locked inside himself. Brother and sister stood just a step back prepared to react to his needs, but so far, nothing had happened.

"Rukia, you must learn to temper your emotions. Things need time to become clear. Wait."

It was easier said than done to still a mind so restless with memories yet unclaimed and roaming free around him. Visually he could feel them all pressing for his attention, all clawing to be put back where they belonged, neatly grouped and filed.

It wasn't a memory as such he was searching for; it was a feeling. A feeling of his power. A memory flashed before him, it's scent was reminiscent of someone he couldn't yet place. Long bangs, glasses…arrogance... Ichigo felt a faint presence of the feeling and reached out to grab the memory.

"Ishida." He recalled the name suddenly. The Quincy who showed him how to find the thread of his life, the read ribbon…boxes, lots of boxes. That was it. He'd taken his Zanpakutō from the box, awakening Hichigo at the same time. The memory struck like lightening through his chest.

"Ichigo!" Rukia leapt forward to grab him as he faltered in his footing.

Ichigo recalled yanking the sword. He opened his eyes and looked at the old man who seemed to be smiling knowingly at him. Ichigo stood in a ready stance as the man bounded down from his perch, the length of glinting metal being released from his back. Ichigo watched as the man loomed closer, closer, closer. The sword swinging around to strike him.

Ichigo smiled back, reached up to his shoulder…

Rukia and Byakuya were both startled as they were swept off their feet by the sudden surge of power that erupted from around the teens feet. Byakuya watched the swirling dust settle and opened his eyes shocked to see Ichigo standing in his shingigami uniform. Zangetsu firmly clenched in his hand. His clothes and hair quivered in the wake of his power.

"Byakuya." Ichigo steadied his gaze on the wide steel eyes. Byakuya jumped to his feet waiting for a profound statement from this awakened creature. "I won't be finishing the gardening." He grinned.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --


	9. Cookies and Sake

Oh don't we just love Wikipedia! Thanks to the heavens for its creation!

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Ichigo wavered as he pulled in what spiritual power he could. It felt so good to remember the two people around him, and this garden…he's sat with…Renji! He'd sat with Renji as Rukia recovered once.

He wanted to run around the whole of this town and let the rest of his memories fall back into their allotted slots. He wanted see everyone he ever knew and shout their names at them in glee.

He felt the weight of his sword in his hand and realised that it felt damn heavy. As heavy as it did after a huge battle. It swung back onto his back, wrapping itself snugly into the bandages and nestling on his shoulders like another long lost friend.

"How do you feel?" Byakuya watched tentatively as Rukia cheerful hit a playful punch into his arm.

"Whoa. Like a train ran me over." He said at the pounding that has settled in for the night on the top of his skull. His grabbed a handful of orange hair and wished he hadn't remembered that headache. Ichigo stumbled, his legs giving into the tiredness he'd felt. Byakuya's arms were there supporting him and Ichigo looked into the calm steel eyes. "So tired." He confessed his eyes closing as his body slackened against the nobles form.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Hichigo, stood on leaning against the wall as Nell, in her child form, crept out of the kitchen.

"Oh." She looked at him and quickly hid something behind her back.

"What have you got?" he asked knelling to his haunches in front of her.

"Nofing Hwitcigo." She gave him her best grin. He placed a hand on her head and turned her entire body like a screw cap.

"Cookie?"

"Huwungreeee" She looked at him with those huge endless pools of pity and he tutted.

"I want one too!" He grinned raising his eyebrows at her. "Only…I wanna play a joke on old pinky in his labs."

"Nelly hewp woo!" She bounded enthusiastically up and down.

"You're my diversion then."

Hichigo, crept in as the loud crash that was once the cookie storage fell to the floor and all the Hollow staff in the kitchen screamed at the child Hollow. It was easy to find the labs allocation of food, kept separate as the snide pink man feared any kind of interference with his experiments. Their food was weighed and measured out exactly as he wanted it. Hichigo poured the valuable bottle of sake into the cooking pot and grinned. The labs and rat cages of his experiments were in for a good night tonight. He looked at the other high proof bottle he'd brought and shrugged. _Ahh what the hell, they'd have a __**really**__ good night. _

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya retired early. The meal had been eaten quietly, but timely it seemed. As he slid his uniform off, turning to the bed hearing Ichigo in the throws of a nightmare.

"_You know Kurosaki, you're my first LIVE human in my rat cages! I was just wondering how you differ from a normal soul." Ichigo looked at the range of instruments beside the metal bed he was restrained on and his eyes opened wide towards the grin on the evil man's face. Ichigo watched the man pull out his Szayel's zanpakutō,' Fornicarás' was released. "sip" Fell from his lips. A pair of wings grew on his back as his lower body transformed into a flock of long tentacles, and a blood-like liquid dripped from all over his body. The scream from Ichigo that echoed around the labs…_

…echoed around the guest room and Ichigo jerked awake. His breathing was rapid and he shook.

"Ichigo." The concerned voice drifted into his ears and he looked with frightened eyes up at Byakuya as he tied his obi around the white sleep yakata.

Ichigo sat and slid his knees up resting his elbows on them to scrub at his over active mind. Tonight wasn't really any different to any other before, but it felt different. Where Byakuya would have just slid in beside him and held him before, he didn't feel that was appropriate anymore. Ichigo was no longer that helpless child as far as he knew. He sat himself on the single futon watching the teen holding his head and trying to shake off the images his dream had left him with.

"Byakuya." The eyes looked up from the knees.

"Yes?"

"Would you…I… please." He couldn't form the words, but the pleading for comfort in this misted chocolate eyes said everything else. They spoke of his need for some physical contact that could remind him, all of the things that happened with Aizen were in the past now.

Obliging the teens request, Byakuya slid into his bed and pulled the teen into his chest. Ichigo let himself settle on the firm torso, his body be wrapped into the arms he had felt every night so far. It was this comfort that had got him this far in his recovery. This comfort that gave him the strength to rise above the dreams that tried to break him in the absence of his tormentors.

He unwrapped his arms from between them and slid them around the nobles waist. There _was_ a difference tonight. A difference for them both. Ichigo was making a choice for his future again, trusting the messages of his inner world; the last traces of his brother who guided him towards his sanctuary.

He closed his eyes as deft fingers dragged gently through his hair and stroked his neck. He relished the breath that fell with a soft repetitive flow across his bare shoulders. The smell of the now recognisable scent, came with its own set of calming influences.

Ichigo looked up at the warm features and searching eyes that wondered if being more intimate would be allowed. He smiled a small grateful smile and slid himself up higher to look at the embodiment of his sanctuary and let his lips touch against the others. It was a simple soft lingering peck of thanks. A sharing of the knowledge that in time it could be more.

Byakuya swelled out his chest with a sigh of contentment as Ichigo settled his head on his shoulder. The older man felt the arms that wrapped around him and gave a quick squeeze. He smiled to himself, tipped his head to fall on the ginger mop and gave a silent prayer of thanks to any god that had the heart to listen.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Hichigo stifled a laugh as Aizen sat with the pink haired Espada and shared a meal. How damn fucking lucky was he! Oh what a night this promised to be!

Gin slid an arm around Aizen, wondering what on earth the man was thinking, getting himself into this state and with the others watching him indeed!

"Come on, time for ya to go to bed ai?" He sighed at the giggle that erupted. The man of dignity was a total wreck. Even Gin in his heart of hearts couldn't take advantage of such a pathetic creature. His night of passion would have to be postponed.

The rat cages were defiantly having a better night than they'd had in a long time. It must have been the first night he'd ever visited that they were all snoring peacefully, drowned in a sea of potent sake laced supper. Their suffering and pains drifted away on respite.

The man he was looking for sat hunched over his desk murmuring to himself.

"Oh Ulquiorra…kiss me…" Hichigo smiled and tapped the man on the shoulder. "Oh…ermmm…yeeess?" The dozey eyes looked up at the innocent face of Ichigo's past Hollow. "You're…Now don't tell me… You're…."

"In a hurry. Aizen wants to separate another Vizard. We caught one earlier!"

"We did! OOOOhhhhh…." He grinned. "Can I play with it?"

"Later. He wants me to have the two injections?"

"Oh…ahhhh…of course…." The Pink Hollow struggled to his feet and wobbled dangerously across the room. "Here." He pointed in a wide arching loose direction that could have been one of three cabinets. Hichigo looked inside each until the almost dozing Hollow finally nodded approval. He looked at the row of needles and suddenly felt quite evil. He grabbed them all and darted out of the room, reserving two inside his pocket.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Aizen woke slowly. He frowned before he even had chance to open his eyes.

"Morning." The cheery sound was very unlike anyone in this place, but the sodden lilt of Hichigo was unmistakable.

Aizen's mind cast along his body, something was wrong…slowly he opened his eyes and looked at the grinning white haired youth. Hichigo leapt onto the side of the bed and Aizen felt the bed rise and fall with his movements. "You don't look too happy." Hichigo smirked.

"No…I…" His eyes cast over the Hollow and shot open as he realised he was tied to the bed. He tugged at the restrains. He focused his energy on the bindings and even tried vainly a few spells but none seemed to be working.

"Tsk. Those collars hey. They really do drain you of your retsui don't they?" Hichigo flicked his fingers around the collar gracing the man's neck.

"Get me out of this now!" The voice was overly controlled and direct. The order was not one that any one in their right mind would ignore normally, but then Hichigo wasn't in his right mind was he.

Szayel's groaned at the pounding headache and dry rasping throat. He opened his eyes, squinting at the bright lab lights and looking hungrily at the glass of water placed in front of him. Just what he needed.

Nell woke that morning too, she looked at the whole bowl of cookies that sat waiting for her and grinned. _Hichigo was so naughty! _She giggled and tucked into her breakfast. The one thing she hated was the push and shove in the dining room that often left her at the bottom of the food chain if Hichigo wasn't there to hoist her up and grab her a breakfast.

Aizen a man of composure and preplanning paused in his struggle for freedom as he heard the screams of pain that echoed around the castle. His subordinates! The pain filled retsui thundered around him and vanished almost as instantaneously as it arrived.

"What did you do!"

"Ahh me?" Hichigo looked innocently at the ex-captains sword discarded by the bed before sliding it into the side of his hakama. "Nothing that a little Hollow separation serum couldn't fix in their breakfast." He grinned. "Or glass of water."

"You bastard!"

"Yep." He grinned. "But if I was as much of a bastard as you, I would have raped you by now. Your guts would be half hanging out and I'd be leaving you half dead to waste away in your own misery." Hichigo shrugged. "I guess I'll have to satisfy myself with this instead." He opened a rip to Soul Society and looked to the powerless leader. "I think Gin and Tousen are busy seeing to your useless army, I guess they'll come in here eventually. At least you should hope its before this reaches the bed." He bent and flicked a kido spell on a pair of ornate draped curtains and smiled as they burst into flames. "Bye!"


	10. Brothers

Mayuri Kurotsuchi's division surrounded the Kuchiki mansion. They stood in a battle ready stance with the evil twisted Captain at their helm.

Byakuya, appeared at the gate, barring his entrance, Renji stood to his side and Rukia the other. Hell butterflies flooded out of the entrance they had just stepped from, flying towards all supporters Byakuya could think of.

"You will not enter my house." He uttered with conviction his eyes narrowed towards the man he despised.

"We must search for the Espada. You are either wishing to capture him to further your own means or harbouring him with intent to hide him. Now which is it?"

Ichigo stood back against the wall of the entrance listening through the open door. Hichigo stood directly in front of him his head tilted to the side as he listened too.

"You and your men will not step one foot onto my property do I make myself clear?" Byakuya spoke again.

"It would be a shame to fight you." Mayuri purred with his evil smile.

"I would not taint my blade with your blood. This matter, if you deem it important enough, will be pursued through the appropriate channels."

"Smart man that." Hichigo whispered to Ichigo. "Ain't he?"

"Shut up and listen!" Ichigo scowled.

"You realised anything about him yet?"

"Your not inside my head right, now, but that doesn't mean you can start to piss me off again!"

"Ohh, you have got your memory back." Hichigo smirked. "Touchy. Too touchy when I mention your boyfriend."

"Hichigo! This is not the time!" Ichigo had barely had enough time to register that his brother appeared in the grounds before the 12th appeared.

"When's the time then? Bed time or will you be busy then?" Ichigo shot his elbow into his brothers ribs and watched him step back with a grunt. Hichigo suddenly realised that not knowing what was happening in Ichigo's life was frustrating. He wanted to know!

Byakuya watched his men arrive and unfold around the 12th. Every one of Kurotsuchi's men had two of his own. Renji trained these men everyday, he knew the were far superior, but he really didn't want any blood spilt.

A flash of captains cloaks and Byakuya noted the appearance of not two but four Captains who positioned themselves between Byakuya and Mayuri.

"Yari Yari. This looks a little heavy don't you think Ukitake?"

"It does." Jūshirō agreed with Kyōraku. Hitsugaya slowly drew his blade and Unohana looked at the sight with dismay.

"What seems to be the problem?" The respected medic asked the genius 12th Captain.

"There is an Espada in there. I wish to take it for experimentation. It seems that our esteemed noble does not wish me to step on his premises and I can only surmise that he is protecting the creature. He is in league with Aizen."

"That's a rather wild accusation." Hitsugaya voice spoke what they were all thinking. "You have proof?"

"Not letting me capture the target."

"Is not proof."

"Maybe we can all come in and talk civilly about this Byakuya?" Kyorahu, thought fondly of the fine sake Byakuya kept.

"I do not permit that man to step in my home without the correct permission of the 46th."

"Well that seems a little far fetched too Byakuya."

"I have been accused of being a traitor."

_All things considering_ Jushiro mulled over the situation, _Byakuya is rather subdued considering the slur against his name and pride. "_Kurotsuchi, these things can take a long time to process. Would you trust me to investigate for you? I can report my findings to you in a much shorter time. That is if, Kuchiki Taichō also trusts me to be impartial?" Jūshirō Ukitake suggested. "The other Captains here can witness the search and confirm my findings?"

"I agree." The evil man nodded with reluctance.

Jushiro looked to Byakuya.

"May I have permission to enter?"

"You may." Byakuya stepped aside. "Rukia, Abarai, if one man from the 12th or the captain step onto the grounds, you have my permission to take action."

"Hai Hai." Renji bowed.

Ichigo grabbed Hichigo by the collar and the two men ran out of the entrance into the study.

Byakuya swept his gaze over the entrance and lead his guests into the smarter reception room he usually greeted official guests in. He ran the servants bell and looked to the waiting captains.

"Well?" Jūshirō looked to the younger Captain.

"I thank you for coming."

"Well?" Jushiro pressed further.

"You do not believe that I am a traitor?" Byakuya looked to the man.

"No. I do not. But I do believe that there is some truth to claims, but I do not know what truth I'm seeking."

"Jushiro!" Unohana said surprised. "Do you realise what you are saying?"

A servant entered the room and bowed their head awaiting instruction.

"Tea." Byakuya stated. "And send find my guests. Send them both in." She bowed further and slid backwards from the room.

"Guests?" The snow topped child prodigy asked.

"Ichigo…" Byakuya stated looking up as he stepped into the room. "And his brother." He completed his sentence as the Hollow stepped in.

A collective gasp passed the Captains, who all but Unohana drew their swords.

Ichigo drew Zangetsu and stood in front of Hichigo wielding the twin sword, Byakuya flash stepped to stand beside him, but he did not draw Senbonzakura, but with the ability of senka, he didn't need to.

"Quite remarkable." Unohana spoke awed by the vision of the twin boys. "How?" She approached Ichigo.

"Get them to put their swords away first." Ichigo stood looking at the others warily.

"Ichigo, we would never normally wish to fight you." Tōshirō explained.

"You strike him and you strike me."

"Please gentlemen." Byakuya rested a hand on Hichigo's shoulder. "This is Ichigo's inner Hollow. No this is not the first time I have met him but he rescued Ichigo and I believe he has a something that would prove his allegiance to us."

"Prove yourself." Ukitake demanded. Hichigo stepped between his protectors and pulled a long green hilted blade from his side and handed it to Byakuya.

"Aizen's zanpakutō Kyōka Suigetsu!" Hitsugaya said surprised. "You killed him?"

"Or mightily pissed him off." Hichigo grinned. "I left him a little hot under the collar."

"What did you do?" Ichigo turned to ask him.

"I got these." He pulled out two syringes from his side pocket.

"No." Ichigo stepped back away from them recoiling from their sight.

"It's the answer Ichigo. It's the only way."

"But…" His eyes were wide and his head was shaking. "Last time."

"It restores us, is that not worth it? Isn't this what you wanted? Or have I been replaced?"

"You only just appeared Hichigo, I think Ichigo just needs some more time. He has not had it easy since his return."

"No and neither have I!" Hichigo spun to Byakuya. "I got them, every last one of them. I slit their guts, their throats, poisoned them, maimed them…I have the blood of more Hollow on me than you will in a life time. You saw what he was like when he arrived. I did it, for him. I did it because of what they did to him." Ichigo put his sword back on his shoulder. "I made a promise." Hichigo finished and Ichigo turned his brother around. "I made you a promise and I kept it. I might be a Hollow but hollow is what I feel without you."

"I know." Ichigo nodded. "Put the sword away." Hichigo swung Zangetsu onto his shoulder and let Ichigo's fingers clasp the syringes.

"Without you, I would be dead. I could have died many times and you saved me I remember all that. I might have my memories back from before too, but it doesn't mean I don't remember what happened to me after these was given to me last time. The pain…and losing you." He handed them to Unohana. "I would suffer it all again if it meant we were joined again, even if is scares the pants off me." He looked intently at his hollow and sighed. "I'll do it."

"Ichigo! You are no longer a vizard!" Byakuya raised his voice in alarm. "You stand with your own powers. No more rejection from people who do not understand you. No more being identified as a threat to soul society. Don't do this. Don't let Hichigo do this to you."

"I've spent my life being different. I've been ridiculed, threatened, beaten and rejected. That's what I am. A contradiction. Hichigo is me, we are the same person. He was always inside me, always part of me. We were never meant to be separated. I understand it all now. This isn't a choice, it's putting right something that should never have happened." Ichigo's eyes implored Byakuya's. "It doesn't make me a different person to the one you know."

The air in the room was heavy and uneasy.

Ichigo faced Unohana. "Do it."


	11. Don’t stop

Okay, this took a little while to decide what was going to happen, so now focus is complete – here you are!

SMEX ALERT!

* * *

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Ichigo's body convulsed on the floor as the twin powers surged, flared, swelled and spill out into the atmosphere. The Captains Shunsui Kyōraku, Jūshirō Ukitake, Hitsugaya Tōshirō and Byakuya Kuchiki knelt helplessly around the teen.

Retsu Unohana, did not seem to be doing anything to calm his juddering form but watching and Byakuya could barely control himself. What could he have done however? This was no time for his selfish whim of panic.

Retsu, observed the youth, she regulated his ragged breathing and stroked his turbulent mind with her healing powers. She knew it looked horrendous externally, with his body into uncontrollable spasms, but she also knew he was not in any danger. At least this way he felt no pain, his unconscious body took the strain and he would be drained and ache from the extreme stresses placed upon it with the fitting.

What concerned her more were the fluctuations flowing from the still man on her left. His rigid observation and rapid breathing showed he was anything but the calm person he showed.

Gradually, the spasms slowed and Ichigo stilled.

Byakuya's hands gripped into fists on his lap almost shouting loudly at the medic in that simple action that he was struggling with his composure.

"He is sleeping." She drew the green glow from him and as the other Captains got up, she placed a reassuring hand over Byakuya's.

"Well at least that gets rid of the Espada theory." Shunsui sighed relieved taking a cup of the now cold refreshments, but he always felt calmer with a drinking vessel in his hands.

"Does it or have we just condemned Kurosaki?" Jūshirō glanced concerned to his friend who replied with a thoughtful nod.

"He is no different now than the child we allowed into our hearts. Only now, he may hold some vital information that may just finish this war before it gets started." Unohana spoke quietly, watching Byakuya pick the teen up from the floor.

They were pulled from their thoughts as Renji ran into the room.

"Taichō!" He looked startled at the sight of Ichigo in his arms. "The 12th are getting edgy, was that energy Ichigo's?" Byakuya nodded.

"I will deal with it." The long silver hair was thrown over a shoulder and he gestured for Renji to lead the way. The others, minus Retsu, took this as their leave and followed.

"I will take him to his room." Byakuya spoke quietly.

"Byakuya?" She enquired following him. "Do you think we care or mind that you finally released your grief for your wife?" He turned to view her. "Do you think that showing your true intentions towards this boy will make you appear less in our eyes?" She ran a hand through the ginger hair. He did not reply, but turned and continued on hearing her quiet footsteps follow.

"I do not care what anyone thinks. I have always acted upon what is right, not what will look good." He replied a minute later.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"I made sure that he would sleep a while longer. That way he can further assimilate his brother without upset." Unohana explained as she watched Byakuya lay the figure in the bed and helped to remove his outer clothing. "And I think…" She touched Byakuya's hand with a smile and guessed that he would want to remain beside Ichigo. "…that you might want to rest yourself? The others would understand that this was a difficult experience for you. I am sure that this role as his protector these past weeks has been draining on you anyway."

"He has needed constant attention."

"Then I would expect no lesser devotion to duty than you sharing this room with him? I would not have been able to provide that level of care myself. It's a commendable thing, and quite possibly what gave him the strength to commit to this event."

They covered him up and sat silent a moment whilst she checked him again. "On his visits to my division, he was quite, how should I put this? He spoke fondly of you."

"He did?" Byakuya's gaze was drawn from the peaceful features of Ichigo to the amused face of the medic captain.

"I am happy for you my friend." She smiled getting to her feet. "My orders are to continue as you have been. I shall go and see to the others and leave you in peace."

Byakuya remained in his kneeling position beside the bed. He watched the rise and fall of Ichigo's breathing, the pale skin of his face and took his hand in his own.

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Outside at the gates Unohana arrived to see a flurry of white haori emblazed with the number 12 disappear into the streets. The division men fell back and followed their captain.

"How is our patient?"

"Which one?" She asked smiling. "One is sleeping, the other is ordered to rest."

"Resting?"

"Our esteemed college felt rather worn out by all these events."

"Of course." Agreed Shunsui with a knowing smile. "The captain we once knew as Byakuya my continue to soften further?"

"He may." She said with a slight smile and bowed further. "Is this issue finalised or does the 12th need evidence?"

"He is used to us going against him, he'll get over it."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

"Byakuya?" Ichigo stirred and mumbled, the grasp in his hand tightened. Ichigo opened his eyes gingerly against the bright day that rushed into his room.

"I am here." The deep voice rumbled.

Ichigo turned into the naked chest of the captain and receptive to the arms that wrapped around him. He closed his eyes and felt the protection overwhelm him. within moments we was asleep again. Byakuya kissed the top of his head and finally gave in himself to the sleep that called him.

…

The captains stayed at the Kuchiki house for some time, they made excuses that they wanted to keep the peace, but really they were just curious about the budding relationship. Rukia managed to push the men out the door after a light evening meal and Unohana promised to go once she had checked on Ichigo again. They had all felt the his energy spiral around the house since the injections took affect. They had barely settled in all this time since.

She opened the door and quietly smiled at the scene in front of her. Ichigo, facing Byakuya, his head tucked under the captains chin, his own hands resting open palmed on the bare chest of his protector; who in turn had secured him within a tight hug that held him as close as possible.

With care she eased herself down to throw her green rays over the teen, careful not to disturb the clan leader.

"Retsu." Byakuya looked up frowning in a sleepy daze.

"Just checking once more before I leave. Go back to sleep."

"Is he okay?"

"Just still fluctuating."

"I can feel that but it has lessened." He yawned.

"He seems otherwise fine."

"Has that abomination of a man left?"

"He withdrew. We will all make our reports to the sotaicho. Hitsugaya has already gone."

"You do not need to cover for me."

"We always protect those with good intentions." She smiled. "Sleep."

-- ByakuyaXIchigo --

Byakuya woke with a start at some point in the night. Ichigo was not in the bed and he looked up worried. The light from the bathroom drew him like a moth.

Ichigo stepped out the bathroom and halted abruptly at seeing Byakuya approaching naked. Ichigo's face coloured with a blush. His mind instantly recognising the sight as incredible. The sight of Byakuya's perfect body sent a thrill down his spine.

_He's so perfect. Why does he have to be so perfect?_ He thought, running a hand through his hair.

Ichigo couldn't help but look at his cock. Curiosity, it's not just a girl thing!

"Would you like me to dress?" Byakuya noticed and smiled.

A tremor of worry was beginning to rear its ugly head. _Why, would he want me after everything that they did to me? _Ichigo hesitated in answering as him mind filled with the thoughts he remembered and the new images from Hichigo's memory that were so different from his own.

"No." His quiet voice replied avoiding all eye contact and the vision in front of him.  
He shook his head and stood nervously in front of Byakuya. "Will you…hold me?"

"I will." Byakuya replied _But my friend his its own mind._ He worried himself.

Slowly Byakuya approached him feeling the stirrings of an erection he knew he wouldn't be able to do anything about. It wasn't even as if he could be thankful for his trousers to keep 'his friend' in his controlled zone as he had done these past weeks.

Byakuya held him, closing his eyes drinking in as much of Ichigo as he could; his smell, the feel of his hair against his cheek and the warmth of his skin. There was nothing as powerful as skin to skin contact. He almost fought against Ichigo pulling away as he wanted that precious, innocent and short moment to go on longer.  
Instead of stepping away from him as he expected Ichigo's eyes searched his and he could feel the longing radiating towards him.

Ichigo let Byakuya's soft tender kiss fall on his neck and he groaned at the lightness of the touch. It was as if there was no one with him, he was so gentle, as if an imaginary lover was stroking, caressing and kissing him. Ichigo's eyes closed and he leaned into Byakuya's beating chest.

Byakuya trembled as his fingertips lightly brushed down Ichigo's arms to tug his robe loose and expose the nipples he had hungered for.

Ichigo's hands ran through Byakuya's hair as he bent to take a nipple in his mouth. The nobles hands clasped the younger man's buttocks and drew him towards his yearning cock. His head massaged against the silk fabric covering his crotch and felt the release of pre-cum moisture with anticipation.

Ichigo stepped back and dropped the yakata to his feet. He looked at Byakuya nervously revealing his unprotected and exposed naked form. His arms made some attempt to form a barrier to hide behind as he crossed them over himself. Byakuya didn't miss the quiver of worry.

"I'll get the light." Ichigo said turning to switch the side lamp off.

"Why?" Byakuya questioned catching Ichigo's chin lightly.

"I…You don't want to see me."

"You look stunning." Byakuya kissed him softly.

Taking Ichigo's hand he sat on the bed pulling him to his lap giving a moment to be sure; this had to be right for him. There was a deep need within Byakuya to nurture and cherish him. What ever it took, he was going to pander to Ichigo, cosseting and indulging his needs. It had nothing to do with being gallant or noble and everything to do with how much he cared.  
"Are you sure you want to do this?"

Ichigo answered by pressing himself into Byakuya and kissing him urging him on.

The young man's nipples felt like heaven against his chest and he caressed slowly up his leg. Byakuya needn't have been so worried, this was a first for Ichigo too; first time for such an act with someone he cared for and wanted to give pleasure to.

Byakuya's tongue eased into Ichigo's mouth and he felt a sparkling excitement fill him. The hold on him was firm and reassuring and nothing like he'd imagined.

All those previous experiences had been about the enemies needs; Ichigo's needs had never had even a passing glance. Byakuya felt so different; his fingers seem to know where Ichigo wanted to be touched and in ways he only thought were fantasy made up in the books he'd read. There was no rush or attempt anything too intimate. The simple feel of Ichigo's skin was enough for Byakuya. The sounds of his breathing told him all he needed to know.

His face was flush, his breathing hesitant as Byakuya slid his hand delicately up between the toned thighs. Listening to his small gasps he moved to caress the head of Ichigo's penis with small circular movements, the sound was intoxicating. Ichigo looked at him with wide expectant eyes as he felt the warmth and sensation building higher. Byakuya gently sucked a nipple giving it a small bite as his breathing became pants of readiness to orgasm.

Unlike other partners he had had before, Ichigo was almost still and rigid as he came. Byakuya watched his face turn from surprise to almost pain as the orgasm struck. Ichigo had never had a man do that before, with such care and the rush of intense uncontrolled internal shuddering made him feel self conscious and out of control.

Byakuya felt him tense and looked to see his eyes filling with tears.  
_Your not ready for this_. He thought.

He pulled Ichigo into a hug and held him as he cried.  
"You don't have to do this for me." He whispered.

"But I wanted too."

"I can wait." He whispered kisses in Ichigo's ear.

Ichigo had no idea how Byakuya could stop himselves mid flow or what Byakuya was feeling after today and now this. But his hold around him was incredible and he never wanted Byakuya to let him go.

Reluctantly they moved up the bed and sat a moment holding each other again.  
They were both enjoying this new awareness of each other and neither really wanted to sleep; Ichigo doubted that he could his nerves were too great. To be here next to Byakuya, the light on and completely naked was terrifying.

"Byakuya…I can't sleep now. Its late why don't you?"

"Ichigo…" Byakuya looked into the eyes that tried to avoid his hoping to read some understanding in them.

"No, don't make out I'm wonderful and it doesn't matter." Ichigo blinked back more tears and Byakuya took hold of his chin and drew his face towards him.

"It does matter that they made you feel like this and it does matter that you don't know how wonderful you are."

"For me sex has been about violence and forcing me…I can't help thinking that its going to happen again. Aizen made me feel…worthless."

"Your not worthless, your incredible."

He kissed Ichigo again softly and his arms wrapped around his pulling Byakuya over his body. He wanted him so much, wanted to feel him inside him and hear his moans with his touch.

Ichigo's hands running down Byakuya's back and over his backside were sending him insane, but he had to keep control; to continue now would be wrong.

_He's not ready._ He reminded himself "Your perfect. Everything I want." He whispered before sitting back up. "We can talk in the morning."

"Don't stop." Ichigo pleaded and Byakuya paused looking at those coppery eyes. "I want this now, I really want this now."

"Another time." Byakuya looked at him and shook his head.

"Please Byakuya, please. I want to wipe out all the times Aizen hurt me. This is killing me waiting and wondering; wondering and wanting you so much."

From his sitting position, his hand gently stroked Ichigo's belly and he bent forward to his nipple, rolling his tongue around its firmness. Ichigo panted in anticipation as his hand caressed down to his erection. Byakuya fisted the hard organ and began to move with Ichigo thrusting to the motion.

Byakuya kissed up his chest to Ichigo's neck and listened to his soft surprised gasps as they heightened in pitch until he drew a large breath and froze as he sprayed their bodies with his cum again.

Byakuya looked into Ichigo's eyes and smiled.

"Okay?"

He nodded.

"Really?" But Ichigo nodded and smiled. Byakuya still wondered as he prepared the teen with some lube and positioned himself between the long legs. "Just look at me…Keep looking at me." He said softly. Byakuya whispered it again as he prepared to enter him. "Just look at me."

He caught Ichigo's eyes widening scared as the tip touched ready to push inside. "Your so special." Byakuya whispered, his full weight on him, his lips brushing over his as he spoke. "I love you." He said gently pushing his full length in.

Ichigo closed his eyes, arching his back and let out a soft moan. With long slow thrusts Byakuya filled him; he was tight and it felt amazing around his length. Each thrust slid in and out to its full extent, each the more wonderful to the sounds of Ichigo's pleasured moans.

"Oh Ichigo." He breathed repeatedly over and over with each thrust.

Ichigo hands held the small of Byakuya's back tightly encouraging him to push harder into him, driven by the intense feelings rushing around him. His girth rubbed against the opening and Ichigo felt the intense jitters of an orgasm building again.

Byakuya watched Ichigo's face intently as he began to move to his thrusts and began rushing him into deep rapid pushes. The urgent moans hit at his senses building up to the crescendo as Ichigo came letting out an involuntary cry digging his fingers into Byakuya's buttocks. It was more than enough for him and Byakuya was flooded with a blast of orgasm.

Ichigo watched Byakuya's face screwed up biting his lip, his hips jolting against his as he came. After some moments and receiving some soft kissed he opened his eyes and smiled.

Ichigo pulled him down into a hug which his locked arms accepted gratefully. Byakuya's breathing slowed to normal and he kissed him gently back.

Nestling beside Ichigo a while later, their trip to the bathroom to clean complete, Byakuya closed his eyes. "Can we go to sleep now?" He chuckled.

Ichigo watched him smile as he said it. "Byakuya?"

"Erm?" A sleepy voice answered.

"I love you too." He said giving him a quick peck.

"I know, be quiet now and go to sleep." He said seriously but the smile remained.


End file.
